We all are in hell. Every damn last one of us.

One step forward; two steps back.

...and, like, immediately after they say it on TV, for some odd reason.

Trump sure has a lot to say about news sources he seldom watches.

It is absurd to me that we live in a world where we have repeatedly hoped that Mitt would be some kind of “voice of reason” politician, either as a late Presidential entry, a post-election replacement to satisfy the Electoral College, or someone to fit Orrin Hatch’s seat. Truly, this is the Darkest Timeline.

In 2012 when I thought Mitt Romney was the forthcoming apocalypse who said things like “Binders full of women” and disclosed his taxation rate of 13%.

Considering how many people have been caught lying about this recently, I’m beginning to wonder how many have gotten away with it?

““sometimes he and Katie’s shenanigans get out of control.””

Also, oh my god, I hope that whoever was questioning them at that point was astute enough to get them to confess to prior such crimes by following up with “oh, what kind of shenanigans?” Because that guy looks absolutely dumb enough to fall for that. 

What was the thought process here? If we show him with a little girl and he’s not molesting her that’s a win? I am..I just..can’t. The mind boggles.

Their polling operations are separate from their news reporting and generally as reliable as anywhere else. This is, quite simply, a hard election to poll. There’s not a lot of data on Alabama special elections. They’re rare in any case, people seldom pay attention to them because Alabama races are seldom competitive,…

“See? I didn’t jump all over this 12 year old girl. I’m not a pervert, can’t you all see???”

I just figured it all out. This isn’t the darkest timeline. This is The Onion timeline.

Sometimes I think of myself almost a decade ago, so excited about Obama’s campaign. Then I try to imagine explaining 2017 to that woman. This is one of several times when words fail me.

So this is either the height of tone-deafness or the height of chutzpah.

It’s not that crafty.

I’m assuming someone has called DCFS on that girl’s parents, right? If not, I can. Ew. Ew. Ew. Ew. I can’t bring myself to watch it, but I’m imagining at the end he was like, “Hey, look! I didn’t touch her once! I’m gonna wait until her mom says I can, just like I always done.”

That’s surprisingly crafty for Fox but holy shit that makes sense (and will probably sadly work).

But his voters don’t see “pedophile.” All they see is “NOT DEMOCRAT!”