(Jovial) "Show your tits!'
(Serious tone) "Show your tits."
(Slightly annoyed) "Show your tits."

Was I the only one who thought of Soundgarden when I saw that California and Minnesota had the same pick?

Fun fact: Joe Buck was born in 1969, the same year that "Midnight Cowboy" was released. "Midnight Cowboy" was the story of a male prostitute who moved to New York to make it rich. That male prostitute's name? Joe Buck. Coincidence? PROBABLY.

We should round up all the Gays, send them to an island, and then nuke it until it glows.

I don't know why he hates Randall Gay and his family so much.

At least chicks dig scars, right?

See the joke is funny because Jeremy Lin understands that peanut oil has a very high burn temperature that is ideal for deep-frying because he went to Harvard and actually paid attention in chemistry class.

If you're driving along and there's a unicycler on the shoulder, your odds of hitting him by accident have to be 50% or higher.

Unless you've spent enough time in Portland. Not only will that shit not even phase you, but the average bicyclist in that town has a fucking death wish.

Because the harness was hidden, it looked like Rocky had been hanged and presented on the court as an omen for something.

Looked like? Did you SEE that game?

This "Eric" character is obviously a pussy. I have also tried Game Day Ice and it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, though I never bought it again. And considering that Grocery Outlet sells it for around $2 a 12 pack, that's quite telling.

Japandroids are the band of the summer. Don't let Gotye or Fun tell you otherwise.

+1

We can't wait for NFL season to feature the Miami "Doggystyles" against the Buffalo "Blowjobs."

Chris and this woman communicated with each other and in 2011, this woman, who represented herself as 21 years of age, flew to Colorado, showing her required identification.

And Mike Cooper lets out a sigh of relief.

What makes you think it's "dumb" to stick your dick in a pie? You could be a MENSA member and still want to do it because you just wanna see how it all plays out.

Odette noted that no super powers were witnessed by the officers on the scene.

Joe Cowley (pictured, far right)

I never got that kind of attention when I was in college.

As always, be sure to send in any would-be penises to the tips department.

A $3 taco? I think that's the real crime here.