Reporter: Are you aware of the allegations against Adam Gotsis?

The dodger did win.

This is the worst Lakers-Magic screwup that doesn’t involve AIDS.

Let’s not be too quick to judge Ms. DeVos. Maybe her plan was to meet with three people, then each of those people would meet with three more people, and so on and so on.

“...and the US needs to go BACK BACK BACK BACK BACK BACK to segregation”

Two phony rocket attacks in one week.

Not wanting it to go to waste, I did a quarter ounce of cocaine, fucked my wife’s sister like I’ve always wanted to, called my boss and called him an old bald cocksucker, then burned my house down for fun.

Non story. The only reason she was spotted under a highway underpass was simply because she was trying to get an interview with Johnny Manziel.

“It’s funny to hear a female write about concussions.”

You got that make-up, uncalled fumble on Kelce and then got a free touchdown out of it.

WELL SEE NORMALLY IF YOU GO ONE ON ONE WITH ANOTHER CANDIDATE YOU GOT A 50-50 CHANCE OF WINNING. BUT TRUMPS A GENETIC FREAK, AND HES NOT NORMAL. SO SHES GOT A 25% AT BEST AT BEAT TRUMP. THEN YOU ADD GARY JOHNSON TO THE MIX? HER CHANCES OF WINNING DRASTIC GO DOWN! SEE THE 3 WAY AT THE VOTING BOOTH, YOU GOT A 33 1/3S…

Not the first time today I’ve seen the Browns leave streaks around the lower bowl while circling the drain.

Bad week for Philly. First they lose Wentz, now they learn they could have sued McNabb years ago for making bad passes? Yeesh.

“Green Bay owns the Browns.”

Since you are one of the Deadspin Idiots that taste-tested, then ranked, chain pizzas, which is it: the best (according, somehow, to your rankings) or trash? It can’t be both.

Cue the people who will be trying to make jokes about this awful topic...

“Looks normal to me.”

LOL. Fuck you John Elway you horsey piece of shit.

I hope he makes a recovery like Kevin Everett

Remember, Aqib Talib is an anagram for “IQ lab bait”