Career recap:

I use Peet’s grounds in my French press. Are we friends or not?

Came here to post this. Have a star.

“Cancer at Verizon” is redundant.

That guy in the turquoise race suit has some sweet crotch-wings.

So Dec, then?

Literally the second- and third-best cars with an 11 appearing somewhere in their names!

With all due respect to Big Poppa Pump,

sploosh.

It’s a person who enjoys Jell-o picnics.

Now that this has been published, I look forward to the Bills’ inevitable loss tonight.

Thank god I’m not the only one around here who still recalls the heady days of Jalopnik Gold.

Why is this not a #fancykristen story?

Syracuse. They also wear orange, and everyone who lives in that city wants to kill themselves.

All Jalopnik product news articles should be exactly like this from now on.

If you were ever wondering what the definition of propaganda is, it’s”fair and balanced” media personalities repeating a politician’s slogan as their own with not even a hint of self-awareness.

Wait, WHAT?

Whoever penned that sentence should be prosecuted for torturous use of commas.

THE DREAD PIRATE NHTSA IS HERE FOR YOUR SOOOOOOOOOOULS