stochasticfats
Stochastic Fats
stochasticfats

You see the way that one black face pops up in a sea of whiteness, and looks around incredulously in response to a white man saying something absurd? That’s what it means to be black in America, every day. That gif is one of the best metaphors I’ve ever seen.

Davis was definitely the throw in part of that trade, in the same way that Noah Syndergaard was the throw in when he was sent to the Mets. He was a failed starter who turned into a brilliant closer, and no one ever sees that coming. I’d never hold that against the Rays.

Imagine if our last president, who was a “Kenyan Muslim Liar”, somehow downplayed or screwed up the second biggest Christian holiday celebration at the White House. Would there be metaphorical or literal pitchforks and torches? I’m thinking maybe both.

He was pretty good last year, but he hit .259/.336/.461 with a .797 OPS. His WAR was 3.2. He wasn’t THAT good. But he’s still only 25, and he has time to live up to the crazy high expectations some folks had if he just stays healthy. It just feels like he went from being a big deal to suddenly not mattering to most

Remember when Wil Myers was really good at baseball? That was a thing once.

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Kendrick Untitled, from the next to last episode of The Colbert Report

Also, didn’t he start off hot last year before things started going wrong?

If the Packers win the Super Bowl this year, who’s going to be the first idiot football writer to blog about how Rodgers was able to “just focus on football” without Munn around? My money is on Pete Prisco.

If Jim Starlin created a basketball player, he would definitely play like Russ.

Seriously though, why the fuck was LeBron still on the court with 4 minutes left in a blowout? The playoffs start next weekend, and the Cavs were playing the second game of a back to back.

So basically, he dedicated thousands of words to saying “Black people are naturally talented but lazy and arrogant so you shouldn’t draft them as quarterbacks.”

Imagine, for just a moment, if Sonia Sotomayor had been caught plagiarizing passages in any of her books or papers, ever. White People would have marched to D.C. and burned that whole city to the ground.

94% if black women voted for Hillary, and 53% of white women voted for Trump.

When someone does all of the abhorrent things they tell you they’re going to do, you should not be shocked. Angry? Yes. Hurt? Understandable. But shocked? No.

I deeply appreciate the Tick reference

Simmons’ wife should have left him after he wrote that shit about Jessica Simpson. Jesus...

Two things I will never forget for as long as I live:

I can’t think of a sports video in recent memory that makes me happier than McCutchen giving his gloves to those two kids. I could watch that every day for the rest of my life and never get tired of it.

Can you imagine if a Muslim politician said “I can’t be alone with another woman because of my religion”? Hell, imagine if Obama said it. White people would scream “SHARIA LAW!!!” and burn this country to the ground.

So do the Blazers win a Game against Golden State? I say they win Game 3, because the Warriors are almost always bad in Game 3 for some reason. I also see the Blazers coming really close to winning either of the first two games in Oakland, before blowing it in the last three minutes.