I’ve only ever heard “Whole Check.” Why doesn’t Whole Check make sense? People rarely, if ever, say paycheck anymore, unless you work for a bank I guess.

Look, if you’re going to build something that looks like a shitty 1960s Doctor Who villain, you don’t get to complain when someone trashes it.

The shot of him leaning over, tugging at his shorts and chewing gum while being completely pigeon toed damn near killed me.

First off, Molly, thank you for doing this. I look forward to reading the book.

“Peterson’s son says he deeply regrets the role that he played the night of the incident.”

At this point MLB needs to get rid of umpire warnings. They are almost never properly enforced, so they do more harm than good. Jim Wolf was a disaster yesterday, and Ned Yost saying he thought Wolf did an “excellent job” was hilarious.

I can’t remember the last time I was that happy about a regular season home run. It was like 40,000 people spent 4 hours collectively hugging him, and then he did that.

Exactly. And even though I know a player would be much more likely to see something like that than a writer or a fan, I still feel kind of stupid for never noticing it before now, because it’s so damn obvious.

The Jason Kidd comparison might be the most accurate description of LeBron’s game/body type that I’ve seen. I read that and instantly thought “Oh shit, he’s right. Why didn’t I ever notice that?”

They had already beat the Steelers and the Cardinals that season, and they were on the road both times. They were 11-1 before the Plaxico incident (and the one loss was to the Browns, which is hilarious), and they went 1-4 after. I can’t say they definitely would have beat the Steelers in the Super Bowl, but they’d…

In 2008, the Giants were the best team in football before Plaxico Burress shot himself because he stuck a gun down his sweatpants. We are one crazy night away from Eli Manning having three Super Bowl rings. Eli fucking Manning.

I’m certain that the Mets are somehow responsible for this fuck up — because they are always responsible for any fuck up they’re involved in — but it’s worth nothing that Gomez has been having hip problems for months. Sandy may be using this an excuse, but he didn’t just make up an injury.

I watched the game. This was such a bizarre scene. I’m guessing the hold up was due to the fact that Zack Wheeler just had Tommy John surgery in April, and the Brewers were doing their due diligence in checking his medical records. Either way, Flores was in a really shitty situation.

That track was pretty bland, and this whole Drake/Meek Mill beef is just so damn... soft, but the Joe Carter thing almost makes up for it.

“The sad fact is, while what he did was almost certainly illegal”

“Disney villain” is the best possible description. His kids can never watch Tarzan without seeing the villain and thinking “Oh, shit. That’s dad.”

I know that people will never give a fuck about going into African nations, breaking laws, shitting on their culture, and fucking up their economy. But beyond all that predictable awfulness, how can you even be proud of this? He may as well have literally shot fish in a barrel. What was the point?

All you need to know about this game: when it was over, David Cone said it was the best game he’d ever seen anyone pitch. When someone reminded him that he’d watched his friend David Wells pitch a perfect game just last year, Cone basically responded “Yeah, I know.”

And Nieuwenhuis was on third because Joc Pederson made an incredibly lazy error, trying to backhand a ball that had bounced into the outfield and it ended up getting past him. When your pitcher is going for something historic like this, you can’t be lazy. Pederson fucked up bad.

How is it that the most incompetent team in baseball over the last 50 years was also the only one to not get no hit? Baseball is so fucking weird.