She’s amazing. And yes, glitter does make everything better.

50% of this country is also dumber than the other 50% of this country.

Also with Leo DiCaprio, which is slightly more comprehensible.

There is NO fucking way I would fucking do this - I have found some men to be untrainable. Okay, one. But still. I tend to be a bit brutal in the “culling” process.

She cheated on Orlando Bloom with Justin Bieber?

I bet Miranda Kerr’s breasts feel like bags of sand when you’re touching them.

Is it just me or are we as a society way too obsessed with what other people are doing with their vaginas and penises?

He’s like that kid in high school who decided that he is throwing THE spring break party since his parents are going to his great aunts funeral. He got his older brother to get a pony keg and his dad’s stereo system still works pretty well. He spent a week making a playlist on his iPod and he’s going to lose his…

You know, they might as well see if the Ringling Brothers’ circus is able to preform. It’s gonna die soon, anyway, and represents an America that had its hey-day in the mid 20th century.

NO YOU ARE NOT THE ONLY ONE WITH THE COCAINE

Yep, that’s why no man ever has been raped, no drugs have ever been used to limit people’s ability to fight back, and rape is solely a thing that occurs in a dark alley when a tiny defenseless woman is attacked by a big strong man!

Jared’s too GOOD for Gilmore Girls after the hatchet job they did on his Dean character.

The big reveal....spoilers y’all!!!...Lorelai has Type-2 Diabetes!!!

Fuck it...own it. I hereby relabel Donald Trump "Donny Wrotten".

I feel like I missed that episode of Mad Men.

I mean, this isn’t the first time Pete Campbell’s baby mama kept her pregnancy and delivery a secret.

Or how about.... Cones of Dunshire?

I don’t think it was the height of grunge. Friends came on at the tail end of that era - hootie was grunge’s sad watered-down consolation prize. And that cast would SO be into hootie. The characters are soooo white bread (a black singer, yes, but such a white bread band).

Jennifer Aniston was replaced in Brad Pitt’s love life and everyone in the world has kept noticing for years and years and years.

YES. I love how he's constantly looking around during this scene, like "does anyone see me?" It's really subtle, but you totally get the vibe that he's more worried about how he looks than how he feels.