The thing about that new Tyga track that most made me want to vomit in my own coat pocket is that the song he’s ‘rapping’ over is ‘Children’ by Robert Miles - that can’t be a mistake, can it?

Um... The music he’s rapping over is a song called ‘’children’’ by Robert Miles. I was just sick in my own mouth.

Fake kidnapping is super romantic, no? No!

Mostly annoyed by the fact that the person ‘’critiquing’’ doesn’t know that ‘’a lot’’ is two words

Yuk. Guess she’s a goddess who truly has met her warrior :)

I stopped myself from pointing out the glaring problems in their own lives. But only just.

Damn those pesky officials and the police for properly recording abuses.

The writing is fuckin awful and the message is over the top, but it is sometimes nice to read something that says it’s okay to just be you. I spent hours back home being told ‘’the problem with you is...’’ by my married friends and what it basically boiled down to was ‘’ you’re too upfront; you’re too honest’’. I had…

How did she respond?

Why the fuck is she flying on Easyjet?

Those things you’re reminding yourself of are good things, but it’s not the realtionship that did them, it was you. You have all those capabilities in you still. And yeah, there’s hope for us all I hope.

Sharkopolypse - I don’t think you sound bitter at all. Just a bit not over it yet and that’s okay, you know. You sound rational and self aware and, when an ex takes steps forward that you’re nowhere near taking yourself yet, that is always gonna shake you. You did the right thing by not getting in contact. I think…

Good to know I’m not alone ;)

Perfectly well after. He was a nightmare leading up to it - too much pressure I guess. And he was a disaster at the wedding but that’s another story.

Is your ex Taylor Swift?

I don’t know whether to be amused or sad that when you asked if my ex freaked out I immediately started thinking about how my ex husband behaved after he proposed. Then I read on and realised you meant the exes that came before my failed marriage. That makes more sense.

I like you

I wonder if a British accent makes it easier to get away with

I do enjoy an abusive opening speech to an awards show

I had to stop a pupil from blessing the classrooms and her peers with holy oil in reaction to this shit last week. When I emailed her parents to explain that ‘’while we appreciate that she is keen to help, we are adopting a common sense and rational approach to the game in school’’, mum emailed back in fury and…