Almost as good as a Jewish quartet with the name “Fourskins”. I will see myself out now.

this is the real story here folks

I’m going to start a band called Mulatto Cock.

I actually met Jonah Peretti once at some tech thing. He asked me if I was waiting in line and I said no and he said thanks.

I know this is incredibly petty, but I think it would only be poetic justice if Trump stiffed her like so many thousands of others he’s employed over the years. It would serve her right for her cynical opportunism.

Kate Mckinnon is a Goddess! She can do no wrong.

WHY IS HE TRYING TO DEFEAT AN ENTIRE RELIGION?

Poor Kellyanne! Y’all have seen this, right? More and more, I realize this is really her life.

She’s had a rough few weeks, and by god, her body isn’t letting her hide it.

No problem

... I guess I should feel offended, but I feel nothing but exhaustion and a hollow, dried up feeling. Like I’m a zombie just waiting until November 8th to cast my ballot and then shuffle on out of this detested earth.  

But, if they were sandwiches, wouldn’t that make them Tortas?

ETA that’s what I call a big, beautiful wall.

I was promised a taco truck on every corner, and yet there are no taco trucks on any corners anywhere in the vicinity of my home, school, or workplace. This is very disappointing, and I respectfully request that the situation be rectified immediately, as it is approaching lunch time and I am hungry.

I mean it as in every group that Drumpf has vilified

Well. I’ll be sharing this to facebook and pissing a lot of people off.

OMG, Obama has a black baby?!

“In other news, Hillary Clinton will invite Rosie O’Donnell because why not have a little fun messing with Trumpy’s head while focusing on delivering answers?”

I think this is Trump dogwhistling to his birther bros.

NPR described the “rigged” line of argument as “more of a white flag than a serious strategy”. I laughed, but it was a dry, bitter, mean laugh. All that I have left in me, it seems.