You’re the guy that thinks participation trophies are good things.

I like Mark Sanchez too, but I wouldn’t go that far.

You are correct, that is a really stupid theory.

In Cleveland you have to be the first to find and administer a life-saving shot of adrenaline directly to the heart of an overdosed Brownie the Elf somewhere in the Flats to win tickets.

Thank god. For a while there I thought I was being racist for thinking all the winners looked alike.

This Kinja sounds really smart if you don’t think about it for more than 10 seconds

Yes, the NCAA, which literally took no action in this case, was totally forced into taking action. But hey, glad you’re standing up for the rights of dudes to be sexist, racist shitheads!

Well, I mean, this wasn’t a minor offense that you wouldn’t want to ruin an athlete’s life over, like punching a woman in the face or raping them.

Wouldn’t it have been easier and possibly more uplifting to publish the very short list of men who took responsibility for their bullshit? I realize it would be a short article, but we kind of already know who the assholes are.

The Jets? Seattle beat them in Week 4.

Sorry, no. Thanks for playing.

As I believe the kids say, savage AF.

5'10". He was Marshall Faulk before Marshall Faulk, and if he’d won even one of those four rings, he’d be in the discussion for the top spot on your list. Fight me.

Loved Eric Metcalf as a kid. My favorite video of his is a(n apparently legit) Heisman promo set to a love song by the band Alabama.

Would watch that movie.

You’re just mad because imaginary Cousins averages a triple-double on the Celtics and the imaginary Wizards trade away John Wall and move to Butte, Montana and change their name to the Butte Bullboys and toxic waste spills on the imaginary Deadspin office and you and Petchesky body swap which is fun for a few days but…

1) So this reminds me that it might be a good time to elaborate on a little thing called game theor

Not really true (at least in the US/Canada) with respect to particularly violent acts that are not a part of the game.

Don’t lie. Its those car insurance commercials fool.

look how can we blame the campaign when there haven’t been any contemporary examples of extraordinarily run campaigns that leaned heavily on ground game, grassroots tactics