Huh, given that you completed your masters thesis on this topic, you think you would know that the “disasters mentioned in this article” weren’t caused by standing sections. You also think you would reckon with the fact that many safe seating models do in fact give fans tickets to be in a specific place, that hooligan…

Absolutely they should.

Don’t say you guys....only Dom writes this grade A shit. I am so glad he’s back.

Playing for Wisconsin, I’m surprised his proudest moment wasn’t “our team getting an offensive touchdown that one time”.

Paterno probably could have avoided the injury had he not been too busy looking the other way.

[rhythmic clapping sound]

In our defense, Boston and its people are totally the scum of the earth, or at least the scum of the US.

The flavor of Jezebel lately has been “circle the wagons” and “we ran a perfect campaign”. As goes our comments’ section, so goes the nation, I always say.

Here’s our plan, from what I can tell:

if they want me to fucking tune in and watch football they had better fucking hire lars von trier to make a 30 minute ad spot of Willem Dafoe weeping oil black tears while dissecting a panther and wearing a Pope outfit and in the background the entire Dave Matthews Band is shackled to a wall and being sprayed with…

Your wrong their using it correctly.

Settle down bro and take a deep breathe.

The real reason it worked is that for six months he kept telling everyone he was definitely staying in the blue.

Remember when the NCAA sanctioned Ohio State for its players selling things they owned?

I mean if we’re being honest did you watch the same game as me and how dirty Jones, Besler, and Brooks played they should’ve been out of the game with some of the plays they made. If you’re going to call out a team for being dirty do it for both when both clearly were playing dirty as fuck. Though this was brought on…

Let me say, on behalf of the rest of the world, WOOOOO FUCK YEAH MEXICO!!!

Well, I was wrong, and it did. (If you really thought Pennsylvania, Wisconsin, and Michigan were going to go for the candidate of misogyny and white ethno-nationalism before last night, you could have made an awful lot of money with a bookie.) In any event I voted for her and encouraged others to do so. If I’m the…

All worthless officiating mea culpas, whatever the sport, should be read at a press conference by Hedonism Bot, just to show you how few underlying fucks the offending league gives.

Tessellation, huh? What are you a Nvidia fanboy?!!!!!!

“Triangles are my favorite shape. Three points where two lines meet. Toe to toe, back to back, let’s go, my love; it’s very late. Til morning comes... ooh, let’s tessellate.”