After watching his “Poker Face” in the presence of Nicki Minaj, I will opine that this will not happen.

As a Stoke fan, I vehemently object to your use of the Potters as an example of an unwatchable match, which I would also not watch, but the principle still galls.

The flip side is that a comprehensive list of corrupt FIFA acts would be infinitely long, so 400 pages seems like a bargain.

Yes, naturally, anyone who watched the Finals would conclude that Cleveland’s main problem was “scoring,” and that the defense was Sooper Effective™. So Carmelo is the obvious way to address this. 

Adding Wade would be a net negative and would make the Cavs worse. Adding Carmelo would be a nuclear holocaust and would make the Cavs die.

This will be an interesting test of that well established precedent, “You can’t slander someone while being angry at someone else.” I don’t know the Latin for that, but then, I’m not a lawyer.

I think there’s a two-Urine-Shot minimum at the club.

> The club says tickets are still available.

225 skips per second is quite literally incredible.

Not enough people listen to the wisdom of Edna Mode.

> The loss of the Pistons would cost Detroit millions of dollars in tax revenue ...

You may prefer one of several Lakers examples (Payton/Malone, Chamberlain, etc.). The statement remains false.

Because he joined Garnett, Pierce, and Allen in Boston? I missed that.

Bortles and his compatriots are in luck! They are absolutely not “below average,” in that “putrescent” does not rise to the level of “below average.” Huzzah!

> This just seems cruel.

How fun! This is exactly how it feels to be a lifelong Cleveland fan, except for the everything.

I demand a recreation of this starring Joe Harris.

> The bill now heads to the Senate, where, if it is to pass, it will likely need to be dramatically changed from its current iteration.

Derek Anderson is not better than Colin Kaepernick, because Colin Kaepernick is not Derek Anderson With Rickets.

Nobody likes them, and they don’t care.