Any place I’ve worked that had a telecommuting policy required written proof that parents had childcare in place. If HR was not convinced, telecommuting privileges were pulled.

It reeks. The new packaging has a horrible, foul odor.

The new matte-finish Chobani packaging stinks. It has a gross, vomit-y, chemical odor when you bring the cup to your mouth. I switched to Fage because of it.

Sooo.....Milgram?

This is so fashion victim, she needs a chalk outline made of all the dessicated tears Anna Wintour has ever induced.

Honor Jones is the name of a porn star, whose work involves banging a guy in a bald eagle mask while trying to keep her MAGA ballcap from sliding off.

Do not get a loan or an inspection from the people recommended by your real estate agent. They’re all in each other’s pockets. Our inspector was a lazy moron, and our loan was sold out from under us to BoA within three months.

My long-term use of BCP totally jacked up my endocrine system, and may have contributed to my thyroid disorder. If your endo did not order bloodwork to check your TSH and T4 levels, I suggest finding a more thorough practitioner.

Family Guy joked about the Farmer’s Only site being white supremacist. I think once Seth MacFarlane potshots you, it’s an open secret.

This was a wild ride. Two thumbs up.

I can’t look away from the clone-stamped nightmare that is Omarosa’s left shoulder. Is her flesh eating her shirt?

That is bullshit and I am enraged on your behalf.

If you have a vehicle and some spare time on the weekends, look into rescue transport. No-kill shelters set up daisy chains of volunteer drivers to move their animals around the continental U.S. based on demand. You get a couple of hours with a cute animal, then hand him/her off to the next person. Plus, you can claim…

WHO DOES THIS. WTF. Do you have any pets of your own? If not, do you think that would theoretically change this behavior? I’m curious whether the type of person who does this would think twice about it if there was a potential clash of pets versus just an empty house to be-slobber.

I always wished they would adopt roller derby-esque names. “And now, Miss United Skates, competing for....Switzerland. Wait, what?”

I love her sly, secretive-but-not-really childfree-ness. Also, her eternally perfect hair. No mommy cut for Jen!

How to keep Steph busy: decorate my house like Ciara’s photo above. I’d run around the rooms with a bubble level, fidgeting with every empty picture frame for all of eternity.

Commander Riker writes porn?

The only bichons who don’t have a face full of yellowish-brown, wet slop fur are the ones at dog shows. Every one I’ve ever seen in person looks like it was just chowing down from a toilet.

That also happens when you say nothing. A guy did that chin lift “What’s up?” thing while walking past me once, and I just stared at him, assuming he intended it for the cluster of (much better looking) girls behind me. He paused, snarled “Fucking bitch!” into my face, and stomped away. I was incredibly confused.