She just sucks so much. So so much.

I don't. Want to come wash all my pots by hand?

Oh my God that last one is amazing.

Yeah. Me. I'm the dishwasher. If you mean a machine that washes dishes for you, then nah.

Girl, it's not called "the suicide cabinet" for no reason—when unorganized, shit falls down and tries to kill you...

No. Strangely enough, especially in big cities, most of us make due without dishwashers.

Is that something most people have? The only people I know who have them own their own homes. Many renters don't have dishwashers.

Agreed. If I had to give up one or the other, I'd give up the toaster oven in a heartbeat, because I have a regular oven that can do the same things. I don't often use the microwave for outright cooking, but for defrosting, reheating cooked foods, some frozen prepackaged food, heating up liquids, etc - it's hard to…

Exactly! Wash a pot AND a mug? Are you TRYING to hold women back?

It's the washing the pan that gets me. I am the only one that does dishes (hence why I will let them pile for 3 days. Fuck you, I don't want wrinkle fingers every day!) so I go to great lengths to not make too many. Want to know the bitching at you will get if you take a plate for something like toast? You will wash…

Yeah seriously. And being called a "lazy asshole" is a little dramatic.

Team Microwave Oven!!!!!

Want very fast hot chocolate? Sure, use a microwave. Or put it on a stove, you lazy asshole.

Some of your points make sense...

They're shipping from Bangladesh on Monday. I'm having them drop-shipped to Bakersfield for the tour kickoff next Friday...

I'm not really sure if there are any condoms that protect against radioactivity. Lead condoms, perhaps?

"Itchy Anus and the Inflamed Vulva" is an awesome name for a band. I'm calling it...

This assumes that for endless centuries, people have not had sex outside of marriage, so the nonetheless interesting question is based on fallacy. Plus, the question assumes all erotic encounters involve rubbing genitals. If this is indeed a project Northwoods targeting the realms outside the heteronormative, there…

Haha! If she could stop talking about Princeton long enough!

Kidnapping: non-consensual baby sitting