Thank god someone else understands. I hate sand. I hate how it gets in body parts it shouldn’t be in. I hate how it gets in all your stuff and doesn’t come out for a week. I hate how it gets into all your snacks and makes it feel like you’re chewing on a cheap nail file for lunch. I hate how it turns your towel into a…

Pip’s man looks like the next Dr. Who.

This basically like rioting. It’s not legal, it’s dangerous, it can cause harm, and probably won’t change his shitty position - but bet that congressman didn’t take this shit seriously or personally until she did it.

Did he mean ‘nice’ like settlers giving smallpox infested blankets to Native Americans or ‘nice’ like never speaking back to white people? And this is exactly the type of behavior I expected from this particular Interior Secretary.

And actually the only thing that matters in this is that E.G. Daily is alive and well. Righteous Apples Forever!!!

Can Kendall just stop it. She is an automaton devoid of personality and substance, as a result “hot” is all she ever gets to be. So I guess we can add willfully ignorant and/or dumber than a sack of hammers to her other attributes - though I suppose the Pepsi debacle already confirmed that.

Did Bradley Cooper get his lawyer’s number from the back of a Cracker Jack box, because I think that’s the only way you could end up owing 1,000 euros.

Dude stole a ROWING MACHINE. If you can walk out with a rowing machine under your arm, maybe you don’t need one.

A. Who the fuck is Lo Bosworth.

That shit would not surprise me at all. Family planning = bad. Decimation of marginalized communities = good.

That’s an insult to Napoleon. At least he modernized France’s educational system.

“Smart Cookie”? What does he think Kim is a perspective intern? Perhaps he sold the most candy bars for his t-ball team? Did he win some Dictator spelling bee? Or is Trump referring to Kim’s cracker jack ability to PLUNGE THE WORLD INTO NUCLEAR WAR? So cute.

This is the same argument gun rights activists use to reject gun control. Also fucking moronic. Wish they would apply it drugs so I could go down to Walgreen’s and get some Molly to deal with all this shit.

Clearly conservatives think sexually active, unwed people are Satan’s minions and their unplanned children should be forced to pay for their sins, but what about married people who don’t want anymore kids. They want to withhold access to decent birth control from them too. So what, should married people also abstain.…

Trump rules:

I wish the NRA would take a picture of Trump cleaning a gun in the hopes that he’d fuck that up to hilariously deserved results.

Tell me this is the official video because it’s as frightening/beautiful as the friggin’ Twerking Ice Cream in her ‘This Is How We Do’ video which I literally dreamed of last night. Jesus.

My dog went through the garbage and pulled out a used tampon. I firmly blame Sean Spicer.

Oh my goodness me too!! I asked them to take home :)

For real. Twitter and Instagram are for imbeciles, peasants, and the weak. Gonna handle all my beefs with a fax from here on out.