Looks like those rental companies should have sprung for the full insurance. Not all credit companies cover market crashes.

Plague tests positive for coronavirus. News at 11.

Only if that kid has a salvage title.

“Don’t forget to smash that like button and subscribe to my channel.”

It deserves a warrior’s death fitting for a minivan. Being buried alive in crushed Cheerios and Goldfish while a Radio Disney rendition of Who Let The Dogs Out plays in the background.

Drivers: Spiders in my car? Kill it with fire!

All of this being part of a resource starved simulation would explain some things.

This is the real Shit Has Hit The Fan™ moment. Disneyland is one thing, but Disney World employs about 60,000 people on site and is the engine that drives most of Central Florida’s economy. They’ve never closed those parks for multiple weeks and the fact that they’re doing so as well as stopping all DCL operations…

To all of you “it could never happen here” morons: Read a fucking history book. This is exactly the kind of crisis that authoritarians use to consolidate power. He’s a narcissist, and he’s losing control of the situation.

Mucus can't melt steel beams!

I sense a great disturbance in the workforce. As if thousands of middle managers cried out because their employees are getting a small taste of autonomy.

You have chosen...poorly. That sippy cup is not the cup of a carpenter.

Twitler just got his Reichstag fire.

Local man confirms theory of evolution by natural selection during quest to prove Earth is flat. Story at 11.

Well, the front fell off.

I doubt any of us have seen an invisible driver at all.

And Star Trek’s replicators are starting to look more like 3D printers.