That note brings new meaning to "pen stroke".

You know what else is old and rare? Polio.

It’s a Kona blend.

The only winning move is not to play.

It looks like one of the humans from the WALL-E universe.

I just think they're neat.

Something about it is just unsettling. Like flying a kite at night or watching in horror as a child finds Niger on a map and botches the pronunciation.

PayPal’s dick builds rockets now.

I can’t wait for my G/O Media decoder ring to arrive in the mail. Playing the articles backwards only provided recipes for various herbal remedies.

I’d trust my finances to a beta that can be shut down at any time WHY?

That moment when your rival from the ad agency across town sees you in the car with a woman who is not your wife.

Now is the time.

Meanwhile, 107 mph in a Prius...

Crashing into a retention pond and getting it on with a salamander.

whoop whoop

“It's a girl, and her parents are idiots."

I'd pay $2,999 to never have to deal with people like this seller.

But you’ll miss all of the super fun and not at all awkward office birthday parties where you can watch your coworkers attempt to sing at figurative gunpoint!