There's no way Russ is a 7 Up guy. 0% chance. 

Look at literally any other politician. 

Sandler is definitely on the spectrum, that’s for sure

No, I believe he’s referring to the developer who did not, to my or anyone else’s knowledge, proposition any teenagers.

Jesus fucking Christ, Magic Johnson is the GM! He’s a perfectly fine substitute for all your derision, with the added bonus of factually being the one who puts the roster together. And yes, obviously LeBron has some pull, but he isn’t sitting in a room putting deals together. Magic is. And he’s terrible at it.

No it's not. 

I truly think she underestimated the level of douchery in the BSS law offices. Being more assertive probably would have cleared this up sooner, but maybe not. Also, as other people have pointed out, she shouldn’t have to do anything more than she already had. My real question is what is up with this video that…

That's not what I took from that part, but you're entitled to your opinion. I felt like he was alluding to a larger point about how people are expected to be happy with that kind of life and are derided/mocked/hated if they dare to question their lot in life or push for something better. I don't think he was slamming…

What? When? I watched the episode and don't remember this slight towards working people at all. 

Oh shut the fuck up.

I don’t think age has taken any real toll, at least to the naked eye when he has been healhy,I just think this team is kinda butt. It had Lance, Rondo, Javale, Lavar Ball, ...I think Rodman suited up for a stretch. Oh shit, Michael Beasley! That is a weird team. That said, if LeBron doesn’t get hurt, I think they…

OH SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP.  This is why everyone hates the fucking Lakers. I bet you didn’t say shit the five years between Shaq and Pau, did’ja?

Uhh, they are?

Yeah, this is why missing the playoffs this year might actually be a good thing. There is no way this team is competing for a chip, and maybe it’d be nice for Bron to take some extra time off this summer. I say this as a LeBron fan, not a Lakers fan. I really don’t root for any particular team in the NBA (I live in…

I associate McGrady with the Rockets because that’s who he played for when he did that score 17 in 30 seconds thing.

Not to mention there are people Stanning for Remington Steele in these very comments. Say that out loud. Listen to yourself. 

You don't know a goddamn thing. All of Harden's fouls were called correctly, he's just being a baby about it. 

At first I was like “yeah, I kinda like Trevor Noah and I think he’s grown into his role at The Daily Show,” but then some random person on the internet, whom I assume is a comedy genius, said he sucks, so now I don’t know what to believe.

That’s just goddamn hall of famer Mel Blount!

Oh, our very first bad take of the day. Well, my day, I just woke up.