@JilliefromChile: I'll have you know,my circumcised weetus is moist and generally dressed up as a civil war general. Ya prejudiced bitches. how would you feel if men preferred only uncircumcised women? this is Jezebel Sudan, right?

@Dialogue_Dub: well, they're divorced. So...maybe she wasn't Ok with his routine. Or she quit the marriage to work on the yanking skills

why do I have the feeling he's still going to end up playing shortstop for the Reds?

I'm eagerly awaiting Shaq announcing his new team via AARP newsletter.

Joe Johnson: getting more for doing less since 2001

@Eddie Murray Sparkles: as a fellow unstarred and anonymous commenter I just wanted to let you know I appreciate this comment.

This map needs to be updated. Rhode Island now allows fireworks. Plan your vacations accordingly.

@Peter Nincompoop: Thom Yorke warned me.

Is that a pic of Zohan?

This is another reason the world hates America. fucking rats. Crazy eyes, is an American, we shouldn't be ratting him out. let's embrace the gluttony and cheer on our athletes!

I had to keep rereading that headline. I couldn't figure out what the quarterback was lying about. I don't know what he did to earn that nickname, but he prolly has some secrets he shouldn't ever tell.

as a long time reader and sometimes (awful) commenter, I must say, from the heart of my bottom: I'm not familiar with your work. were you here long?

which of these three is the next Jordan? Can they all be Jordans together? Will anyone be a Pippen to the other's Jordan. Can one Jordan have two Pippens? Can two Jordans share a Pippen? Will there be a Horace Grant involved? Stay tuned.

This guy is the Kwame Brown of sports journalism. He showed just enough promise for someone to take an unjustified and foolish risk on him, he's failed everywhere 'cuz he's turrible, yet he keeps getting chances. And what grown man eats fucking Cheez Doodles without being high?!

@Another BSU Defeat: My circa 2003 xm receiver was stolen out of my circa 2005 Hyundai. My factory radio only provides me with two options in the morning, NPR or my local Fox Sports affiliate airing "The Stephen A. Smiff Show". Smiff is the reason I am now a liberal and have learned to read, just so I can avoid his…

I see Mr. Dabone has been sharing grooming tips with Wayne "pink dough" Rooney.

@sfokevin: It was the alas time he'll be given any special imissions.

That guy in the bar might have been the one to tell them, but alas...

I'm somewhat surprised that Windows can't get seem to get traction in the mobile world. Google's android has become the mobile equivalent of windows. Windows has become the mobile linux.

have they talked to the creeptastic vacuum guy?