JESUS CHRIST DAD USE 807 NOT 7 YOU ARE PAYING COMCAST $250 A MONTH

Cleveland Man

I finally decided to sit down and try and submit a “WYTS” for the Lions. I’ve considered doing it every year, because wow, this team writes it’s own submission every season just by being Detroit. It was golden...about 4,500 words (and I could have gone on for the length of an average dissertation but stopped when I…

Sure, but I think he took the term “backup” a little too seriously.

(Geno, mumbling to himself) ...and with a few well-placed lines, I’ve turned this into a $688.88 check. HA!

Captain America: Baby Eater

The announcers said “Koko B. Ware.”

When Oakland and Washington are the only two dissenters, it’s pretty much a a guarantee that you’ve made the correct decision.

Pretty accurate representation of your Washington Capitals

That's Ggoddamn Ggreat news.

Nah, its more because we’ve spent too many years typing “God this team sucks” over and over and over and over again. We’ve gotten REALLY good at it.

Shockingly Canadian? I believe you mean:

TEBOW 3:16 SAYS I JUST FLUBBED THAT PASS

We need a subway sub Kinja NOW.

Pictured: what Pete Carroll was thinking.

They're doing an upside-down W for each win where someone was looking.

It would make sense if this game were being played in Baltimora

Ref: "You've got to cover up that orange tape."

(QUICK PERSONAL NOTE! This is my 100th column since I was officially hired by Jalopnik back in February. Since it marks the end of the road with my Ferrari, I think it's a fitting milestone. Thank you to everyone for the support, the kind words, the e-mails, the positive comments, and – especially to the many readers…