I was on a plane once and I brought along three tacos and as I began to eat them the flight attendant screamed “oh no there is a girl on board who is DEATHLY ALLERGIC!” So I got up, reached for my pocket hammer, smashed the window and tossed them out. The attendant thanked me, but the tortillas went directly into the…

[scribble notes furiously]

Donald Trump, or as I like to call him, Human Kinja

So do you want athletes with convictions or not?

I can’t believe someone would create a fake account just to score some cheap laughs over a stereotype. That blows.

If this was Jezebel, the title would’ve been “Entitled White Male Harasses Chinese Woman Online, Gets What He Deserves.”

The Iliad don’t got shit on this post holy fuck

which features Martellus saying that “NFL” stands for “Niggers For Lease”

“Worst quarterback in the NFL,” [Michael] says.

That’s a seal.

“the image of a screaming Native head floating above a volcano or whatever...”

You laugh, but I just translated it. It says:

Roberto Cemente

Leading Red Gives Message to America’s Children: “Get Cancer”

Man shut the fuck up

What about those of us that aren’t LGBTQ or Euro?

As far as NBA legacies go, he certainly left behind a permanent bench mark.

Sad stuff. I feel for you, Sasha Kaun, Sa-sa-sasha Kaun.

I’m more of a Bob Weir man, myself. But thanks, Lou. Got any drugs?