Can we bring Jenny McCarthy to the Hague and charge her with genocide?

YUP. This is where all my flower child red rocks dancing gluten free vegan friends live. They'll burn sage to expunge bad energy, but they won't vaccinate their kids to oust whooping cough. There aren't enough quartz crystals in the world to infuse this shit with any goddamn sense. I hope their shamanic sweat lodge…

I have lots of hippie friends who are anti-vaxxers and they just will not listen to reason. It angers me to no end. I have one good friend whose son is a gluten-free vegan due to "allergies" (and yes quotes because I think it's bullshit, and fine, your kid, it's real, I get it.) She refuses to vaccinate him. She is a…

Sean Penn was married to Robin Wright for 20 years and has 2 children with her, yet says that his marriage to Charlize will be his first marriage. God he's such a shit bag.

I'm fat, pretty, and goddamn hilarious. The trifecta. Where's my fucking emmy?

I remember a woman at the Petco totally freaking out on me when I told her that I let my cat outside. She was ranting about how it shortens his lifespan. I told her I would rather him have a shorter happier life where he gets to be a wild cat then live a long frustrated life where he is locked inside and miserable.…

Nope! Cats are incredibly independent. They really don't need us at all. He wanders around the backyards of Brooklyn. Sometimes he takes off for a couple of days. (I like to think he's fighting crime.) He wears a collar, but he always comes back on his own.

It needs to go outside. I had a cat like that once. It would literally run up walls. Then my roommate and I moved to a place with a backyard and started letting him explore outside. (I know, I know. They kill birds.) His personality COMPLETELY changed. He would explore outside to his heart's content and then come…

I believe that one is in the first 15 episodes, and those don't seem to be available on iTunes anymore. But if you can find it the episode is called, "Ellen and William Craft."

There's a great podcast called The Memory Palace that tells this among many other stories from history. All in five minute segments. Highly recommended. https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/the…

Bernadette still looks completely amazing. I am beginning to think that she actually is a witch.

Got 40 seconds in and started crying. Not enough nope in the world.

I do think they are funny, and I enjoy the show. It's a weird thing to specify for me. I feel the same way about Girls. It's a certain icky kind of grimeyness that I can't identify with. They're all so dirty. I feel like it's a generation full of girls who don't bathe.

I watched all of the episodes of this series. I think I'm too old for it. I'm mid-thirties, I'm guessing about ten years older than them. But that generation gap? It feels epic.

Nightmares. Actual fucking nightmares you have just created for me.

This gif is fucking gold.

You're such a fucking champion.

Well isn't this just the worst fucking day ever. Goddamn it Lindy. I'm going to miss you more than whatever object misses whatever object in the metaphor that I am too fucking upset to think of right now. Goddamn it Lindy. I mean, just...goddamn.

Mama Cass would be so pissed.

Just when I thought that I couldn't possibly love you more Lindy, you pull a Troop Beverly Hills Shelley Long tribute piece out of the goddamned sky. You are the wind beneath my wings. Bless you.