This makes no sense.

Glad to see Kane getting some playoff success. Anyone who does this deserves success:

Kurt Angle kicked out of it in his six-man match with the Shield. I believe Braun Stroman has kicked out of it recently, too.

Yeah, anyone can kick out of a finisher now. Except HHH’s finisher, The Pedigree. No one kicks out of that, cuz he’s boinking the owner’s daughter and seemingly has complete creative control to make himself look like the biggest badass, bury the shit out of any wrestler he doesn’t like and book million-dollar…

“He’s a white receiver AND he’s in legal trouble?”

So if Cambridge Analytica “stole” the data, they’re surely going to face criminal charges and be sued into the ground, right? Right? Are you sure “stolen” is the correct term here? I mean, I hope their executives are fleeing the country as we speak, because “stolen” usually implies illegality.

You forgot Yokozuna!!

Ahhh, I get it now. I totally thought you were acknowledging the copyright of all of those wrestlers’ names.

Totally thought this was a belated April Fools post.

Just skipped to the end to see if the bull killed her. Disappointing.

Who is this Deion guy? Looks like an ugly Leon Sandcastle...

You have obviously never attended a UND hockey game (or any hockey game that UND fans attend) before.

Uh, I think you just made it. Gratz.

“Never have that damn thing down in front of me. How I do I know you’re not making faces at me under that thing?”

Neither does Michigan. But all the idiots up here still suck at all those sports Norwegians excel at. Now if only the Olympics had drunk snowmobiling....

The thing that made my eyes wide was the part in the letter where he’s trying to run down one of the girls and says “she was caught having sex with a black man”, as if this was some salient reason why she shouldn’t be believed. And, his sentiment does not surprise me in the least, having lived outside of Memphis for a…

I seriously had to click the link on that article because I thought this was some weird crosspost from The Onion. Holy shitballs.

Jeremy Bloom’s Wikipedia page makes me feel like I’ve failed at life.

“The opening ceremony, which will be attended by many world leaders and dignitaries—including and also Vice President Mike Pence..”

LOL. I love the line “Philly people are pretty decent folks, despite what the news and rumor would have you believe.” used as a justification why the store owner will be fine AFTER PHILLY FANS LOOTED THE STORE.