Reading this makes me want to take a crapload of appetite suppressants.

That's right! The Book-It Program! I was trying to remember the name of said program— that was so long ago and the memory of it is fleeting at best. But yeah, what a great program.

When I was in elementary school, we had a reading program that basically told you "you read this many books in a month, we'll give you a free personal pan pizza from Pizza Hut." As if I needed more motivation to read books, because even as a young child I already had a voracious reading habit. I remember reading…

Damn, I'm sorry, man. To you and your face.

Retirement plan!

My face. Portions of it are dry, red, sensitive, and flaking badly. I probably have eczema, but I won't know until I visit the dermatologist next week. Until then, I'll just keep applying coconut oil and intensely hating myself whenever I grace the public with my hideous appearance.

I would join you, but I'm abstaining from booze for the next few weeks in an effort to lose some weight.

I would suggest making a giant pitcher of Rosé Sangria, kick back, and relax.

"Intruder" - The Antlers
"Sentients" - Fuck Buttons
"Doldrums" - Atlas Sound
"Communion Cups and Someone's Coat" - Iron & Wine
"Confusing Possibilities" - The Six Parts Seven
"Wet Cement" - The Morning Benders
"Drops in the River" - Fleet Foxes
"Late Bloomer" - High Places
"Santiago" - Tunng
"Back in the Tall Grass" - Future…

It astounds me to think that there are still people out who equate Cubans with a darker skin tone. Christ, if you're going to be racist, at least do it right.*

So is Southern Charm an exclusively white ideal or is Southern Charm via black people a nonexistent ideal? I'm so confused.

Have we all forgotten Gary Glitter, or is it not cool now to compare another "celebrity" child porn case with said Gary Glitter?

Oh, I definitely agree. Mama Cass had a beautiful voice, one that blended so beautifully and naturally with the rest of her crew. While Wilson Philips as a whole were a vocal unit that is more studio engineered than befitting actual vocal talent. So in that regard, Mama Cass blows Carnie Wilson out of the water in the…

It amuses me that in many ways, Carnie Wilson became the Mama Cass of Wilson Philips.

"Grey Goose is great vodka!"

Can we please have a monarchy now? With Bernie Sanders as king for life?

"I'm Sarah McLachlan and I'm about to ruin your whole fucking day."

Worse than me attempting to teach my 86 year old grandmother how to Facebook.

Inside the mask another disguise
I fall to sleep before closing my eyes
Tiredness draws in my head a cartoon
Sun at the window, good things coming soon

Last Saturday, I decided to test out more Kombucha cocktails because.. I'm completely obsessed with Kombucha at the moment and why not? The following cocktail, in particular, came as a mad flash of tropical inspiration after I found this stunning beauty of a fermented tea at my local supermarket. Enjoy.
An Evening Tea…