god bless the interwebs

right? like HELLO people have we not watched/read Into the Wild and seen Chris McCandless’s abject failure with the bear? just sayin’ meat goes back fast

oh, like shoppie? frappie? no?

omg you win, fucking squirrel juice, hahahaha

saw some rando FB status update (clicked on the trending topic thing) say that DUH of course Ivanka wore an almost 3k dress, the family makes like 650 billion blah blah blah. 1, I truly think that profile is a fake profile, but regardless 2, lower class people are actually using this argument in support of Trump. In…

he’s pooooping leave him in peace jfc

yes, total pooping face

this should be top comment, seriously

herma-ninny! yes, HRC is totally Hermione. and wouldn’t Hermione make a great leader?

my thoughts exactly...I’m picturing women all over the flyover states staying quiet as their husbands/brothers/fathers/sons chortle about HRC’s stamina and being cheated on, nodding their heads and saying oh sure of course I’m voting for Trump! then on Nov 8th secretly voting Hillary.

ugh, this friend of a friend sounds insufferable. like he read a philosophy book and now understands the world. *rolls eyes*

la co-ca-yeeena

oh, no, we’re all assholes because apparently he said ‘big league’ and we know it and it’s mean to be mean to people on tv.

I got a really mangled “well the Democrats are just as bad” kind of comment today, honestly I have no idea what that person was even trying to say, and it’s someone I haven’t seen since high school. So, easy fix! Unfriend. Family gets the unfollow, cause ya know, family. Doofuses I haven’t seen in over a decade? Buh…

I’m assuming the bus driver was being snarky, but if you were famous, why would you be considering buying a Star Map? It’d be funny to do a skit where an A lister bought one of those because they couldn’t remember where they lived. Of course they’d probably just end up at some rando house in the Hills, cause I don’t…

mmk. I know people like the Pfeffermans. So. They do actually exist. Not saying it’s not annoying AF, and I don’t approve of it, but they’re out there, and desperately all need lots and lots of therapy.

wait, are you me? and honestly I would have preferred the Starline bus (nothing against my car, but a bus demands respect)

staaaaahp u r 2 much, how did you know I have a Prius? :D

so, I worked the post Emmy’s gala last weekend (I live in LA and moonlight for caterers here and there to supplement my main gig, lands me in some funny/weird spots sometimes)