*Remembers iPad video with three- and four-finger multi-touch*

The recycle bin is my paper management system.

@Moonshadow Kati aka Lady Locksmith: My favorite is Palatino, not Palatino Linotype, just Palatino. I do all my writing in it.

@Moonshadow Kati aka Lady Locksmith: I remember everything I see in Comic Sans and Papyrus because they're burned into my retinas.

@GitEmSteveDave: No.

Does it react to the gravitational field of her buxom breasts?

@Aminpro: I checked for you—I'm sure you checked, too—and I couldn't find anything.

@GitEmSteveDave: If she says "Yes," and you're still wary, then you find yourself a camera and take naked pictures of her.

Before you get a hooker, ask her if she wants to take nude pictures for money.

The bottom line always trips the consumer.

@anitesh.jaswal: It was different when the napkin sketch was there.

@Zinger314: The real napkinprints for an iPad are written in elf's blood.

Aw, the napkin sketch is gone.

Obviously, we need to clone a T. rex and give it Valium. For science!

@shokwaav: I bet—no, I know you've never read the novel.

@Dacker: Oh, no! Because Apple is forcing you to buy its products?

@metronome49: Yeah, as someone who's never going to have a problem with being overweight, I don't really care about losing weight.

@BadJoJo: Obviously, but an excess of coffee is different from an excess of water.

@FriarNurgle: We must harness the powers of Swedish Fish and McDonald's food to learn the secret of immortality.

@TheCrudMan: How much caffeine is in that?