Nah u, shorty

Ugh i was about 8 and my mom, brother and i went to corpus christi which was cold and the ocean was dirty at the time. First disaster was splitting my chin open on the hotel slide. It was located inside the indoor area so some other fucking kids had left everything wet and i slipped. I got stitches early the next…

STAHP

I knew a family who would do this. VS stores their bras in the changing room without sensors. When they did have sensors, they would tear a hole and then sew it up.

Yes I have been driving more because shit, when I started driving all together, that’s when prices started to skyrocket. For trips, it just made sense to take a plane since the cost was about the same. Now plane tickets are getting ridiculous (wtf, Southwest?) and now I have taken 2 long road trips this year. I also…

Post-Its, all by herself.

I went to my first concert when I was 14 to see Korn/Disturbed with my stepdad. He wore a sweatshirt with a mallard duck on it. Don’t go to many concerts after that.

It’s the range of his music. Bleeps and bloops. Like the episode of spongebob where they thought mr. Krabs was a robot.

It’s an old Atari game hence the references to Bloops and Bleeps.

Guys I know she’s offputting but remember when Lady Gaga ruled the airwaves for two years straight and then Christina released a song. I had forgotten what real singing was like. I felt like I was bathing in the cool waters of the Colorado river.

When I first saw this movie my bro and I walked into the theater as Angel moves into the hotel. The part that made us both laugh til we cried was:

I miss Seanbaby work.

Thaaaaaank you. I do the same. The last straw for me was when a man approached my brother and I at Walmart. My brother had made me buy lunch that day but then proceeded to give the man $10 after hearing his sob story. A year later in the same parking lot, the same man approached my brother with the same story.

Sometimes I hum the underwater theme when I’m scared at night.

That...that was pretty damn heinous.

I am so sick of priestly bullshit. I am a practicing catholic but cannot stand the patriarchy of it all. I worked in a seminary where my boss was a nun. She was the toughest and sweetest person I have ever known. The bullshit was that she ran the seminary but the head priest got all the accolades and money. She drove…

Damn whoever this Bella Thorne chick is, she is super pretty and she’s only a 17 year-old. Do teenagers skip the awkward phase nowadays?

Emoji are life!!!!!!!

I filed a sexual harassment complaint against a former boss (and won) in which I stated one of the things he did was exactly this (Smile! Get some coffee IN you!). After the case was settled I was able to see his defense of this exact behavior in the compliance report. He said: "... he did this because she looked a…