Re: ATM errors — it happened to me once! Back in college on a machine that dispensed both 5s and 20s I tried to withdraw $25, but it gave me $40 instead. I looked it up and it turns out 5s and 20s are basically the exact same size to the nearest fraction of a millimeter or whatever and machines that have to figure out…

“as far as mass produced lagers go, it’s the best”

But how could we possibly afford to pay the players?!?

Oh, like you’d know anything about being forced out of the NFL due to your outspoken political beliefs. Stick to commenting!

I never thought I’d shoot down a German plane, but I finally accomplished it last summer!

“there actually has been a huge uptick in pedes presenting to the ER overdosing on edibles”

White feminism is everywhere!

“They’re students, no different from any other students!”

Yeah, like I get that fans are sad to watch their team leave, but by all metrics, you’re so, so much better off that it’s hard to get upset about them leaving. I’m sure the city of Oakland has more pressing matters to spend that money on.

Not the hero we want, but the hero we need

And as everyone knows, the best jokes are the ones you need to explain in the comments section!

Love me some good highlights from the most recent round of Peach Basket Hoop ‘Em Up

/Person writes impassioned argument about how out-of-touch white dipshits in the suburbs think they know eveything

Alternately, the Democratic party could feel kinda bad for putting the second-most disliked canddiate in history against the most-disliked candidate in history...

Your ideals and protections of rights that elected Nixon? Or the ones that elected Reagan? Or maybe the ones that elected Jerry Brown? Go fuck yourself. Iowa is 100 times more progressive than you self-congratulatory wankers could ever dream of being.

“Rules that go by strict seniority rather than merit”

Exactly. And I love that quote -- “ I don’t know who would want to be part of this program at this time” -- no shit, dude. No one wants to be a part of the Gophers now, that’s why a talentess shithead like you was the QB for multiple years.

And yet I’m sure you’re happy to accept the Russian hacking story, which has the exact same level of proof. You know, because...reasons.

“That UConn stands a good chance of winning 100 games in a row is a great occasion for fans of the Huskies, but the issue of competitive balance in NCAA women’s basketball is hard to ignore.”

The idea that automation caused the current wealth/income gap (or really even played a big part) is demonstrably false with even the most superficial reading of history. For instance, the industrial revolution caused the earnings of the lower classes to increase dramatically, despite there being, you know, a revolution…