10-15 years ago all the conspiracy nuts were freaking out about implanted RFID chips that could track their every movement.

The site that repeatedly refers to image macros as “memes” is suddenly getting strict about word meanings?

Text + Image = “Image macro”, not “meme”.

How many tens of thousands of dollars is it worth to you to spend a few less seconds on an interstate onramp each day?

‘Not top three’ is a very kind way of saying dead fucking last.

Under normal circumstances I’d never dream of vandalizing a parked bike, but in this particular case I might just find myself ducking into a nearby hardware store to grab a pair of wire cutters...

A racing world, increasingly on the defensive, insists ever more volubly that ‘the horse comes first’. In reality, these horses come nowhere.

Fighting games on phones. Brilliant.

So basically technology has finally advanced to the point that we can make Choose Your Own Adventure television shows?

So still twice the price of a normal car and a hundred times times the inconvenience, but the smugness factor is incalculable.

For all the consumer technology that Microsoft/Google/Apple have unleashed upon the masses, how is it still that there is no better way to share video clips sometimes than pointing a video camera at a screen playing the original?

So apart from the announcers ejaculating all over themselves and the Baylor guy pretending to get blown up to draw a charge, can anyone rationally explain to me how this dunk was any different from any other dunk in the history of basketball?

Imma let you finish, but Harold Weinstein does the best Tomodachi Life songs of all time.

It looks...greener.

Wait, better idea: Just have the app secretly send the phone number with the login. Depending on how you like to roll, you could either block multiple logins from the same phone, or let them go through but flag them silently so you can bust the cheaters later.

If you somehow tie the phone app to a particular phone it could be relatively secure. No way a college kid’s going to give up their phone for an hour for someone else to sign them in.

For the record, that check is written for “Ten and 00/00" dollars, so I’d recommend not cashing it in person lest you get sucked into the inevitable black hole.

For people who can’t/don’t want to put everything on credit cards, the only way to pay for big purchases that exceed their debit card daily limit is either a check or a big wad of hundies.

Yeah, college football is pretty much the only thing the South has going for it at this point in history.* (And I’m from Nebraska, so I know what that’s like)

1) That’s a hook, not a shank. Shanks go dead right.