I don’t actually know who Cory Gamble is, but I know to my core that he can do better.

Well, no. We’re talking about childhood vs. adulthood. Did you worry about your salary when you had Summer vacation? Me either, and we were fucking poor.

I like where you’re going with this. But the real shade is Jane Mansfield’s. There’s Sophia Lauren, sitting there being one of the most beautiful women in the world. Then, up comes Jane Mansfield, “just stopping by to say hi,” and in that moment, has drawn all attention away from Sophia. Then she’s like, “Oh, I…

But that’s just it! If you’re on the receiving end of either of those, you’re like, “Oh, she hates me.” Shade should always leave a person asking their self, (preferably the next day,) “Wait. Did she...?”

No, goddamn it. No. It’s like nobody is even paying attention. While I’m sure that it may, under some circumstances, be possible to throw shade with a well placed picture, NONE OF THESE ARE IT.

This is that guy that everyone dated during their freshman year of college. He was really into your feelings and totally respected your process. He was a very gentle lover and was 100% terrible.

Or he could just start hooking up with women who aren’t assholes.

His skeleton hasn’t always been coated with adamantium, though. And yes, he can regrow a limb.

One of my signature moves is an awkward thumbs-up. I use it to signify, “No you’re not right, but having a conversation with you is making me stupider by the second, so I am going to cut my losses before I lose the ability to do math.”

It was childhood, though, right? I mean, I was ten!

OK.

LOL. Your concern for my embarrassment is touching. That said, your need to point out all the exceptions to the rule just emphasizes the existence of the rule.

Oh, I’m sorry. I was talking about my experience. Today. Stalin, Mao, Gandhi, MLK and Desmond Tutu are not really fucking with me right now.

The irony here is rich. See, Irish people don’t actually consider Americans of Irish descent to be Irish. So, while you’re telling other people to fuck off and get their own “holiday,” Ireland is looking at you, thinking the same thing.

Because Christians tend not to “live and let live.” They seem to be more into “Live and write legislation” or “live and use my religion as a basis to fuck other people over.” Pagans, not so much.

OK, I’m going to let you have your concerns, because you’re trying so hard to be concerned about something. You deserve this.

Again, the right for people to pee in the restroom that matches their gender identity does not mean that it will be illegal to report suspicious activity. Using your logic, the eventual effect of marriage equality will be that it’s illegal for straight people to get married.

Yeah, I’d be right there with you if your speculation had any bearing on anything that is actually happening in the world. You’re going from a starting place of “trans people should be free to use the restroom of the gender that they identify with” and ending up at a place where “it will be illegal to report…

You’re being obtuse.

On one hand I’m like, “Yeah, but they totally ripped off the Girl Scouts and copied their cookies.”