tl;dr

Day-um.

I used to get this until I upped my water intake during the first two hours after I wake up. It might just be me but fasting acts as a diuretic with me. My fatigue was simply morning dehydration.

Lol sorry I wasn’t clear. I wasn’t in a relationship with her. We all went to the same parties. She was on the periphery of my circle of friends and I started seeing her boyfriend when they were “taking a break.” Now that I think about it, maybe she was tying to kill me!

Also sold to pedophiles. :(

I have this: http://acaai.org/allergies/type…

I have the same allergies except that oranges and avocado can kill me. This chick — whose boyfriend I yoinked — assured me that 7layer bean dip didn’t have avocado. 4 hours later I woke up in the ER with a tube down my throat. Bitch didn’t believe me.

Breast reduction surgery.

Breast reduction surgery.

As does John Barrowman.

Why she ain't shot in the ass, yet?

I’m not a nerd but I play one in the movies.

Right?! Or zombies.

Already on it.

Oh, I’m sure that mofo didn’t limit himself to just two wives. Was your family from East Texas and Carlsbad, New Mexico? Grandad could have had families in Texas, Nevada, New Mexico, Colorado, California, and Mexico. On the extremely rare occasion when he worked, he was a cowboy — usually working a herd just to hide…

EXACTLY THIS.

Thanks. Fortunately, I had the best mom in the world!

Sadly, my dad was terribly damaged by his childhood. He wasn't as horrible as his father, but he came pretty close.

My grandad burned it down because he was a psychotic, drunken, abusive, narcissistic bastard. He couldn’t stand to see that my dad — his son — was taking better care of the family than he was - not that he actually gave a shit about them. Plus, he always literally and figuratively tore down anything anyone built that…

Pearl Jam — the entire “Ten” album, especially “Black”.