Let’s take football games played by teenagers a little more seriously.

Vice has always seemed like a really awful company to work for.

Just out of camera range, Joey Porter and Darrius Heyward-Bey are engaged in a fierce debate at the four-square court over the proper application of the “no babies” rule.

I guess my only real comment is that he shouldn’t blame Garrett for the play with 4 seconds left. He’s the head coach and he either failed to communicate his wishes, he misplaced his trust or he failed to train his subordinate in the way that he would wish the game to be managed. Either way, the buck stops with him…

Wade, you seem like the kind of guy that would know the answer to this, been struggling with it for a while now.

To admit to voting for Trump was a mistake takes a level of self awareness that Trump supporters do not possess. They have bought into the Amway. The time share in Boca. The pyramid scheme. They have paid for the extended warranty on their leased Toyota Avalon. They are the temporarily inconvenienced future…

You know god damn well when he fired that truck up, and that big diesel engine started humming, those hog jowls were jiggling like a fat stripper’s ass cheeks.

Actually, he looks to be a full bird colonel, which just solidifies your point.

“What advantages does this war have over, say, an ethnic cleansing, which I could also afford?”

The really great thing is, you don’t have to be alone with a woman to take away her access to health care.

During a practice lunch interview, a coach chided her for ordering cranberry juice, saying it could be interpreted as a sign of a urinary-tract infection, she recalls.

I’m rooting for Northwestern because I had a Northwestern Starter jacket when I was a kid and it was awesome. Also had a Charlotte Hornets one. God, Starter jackets were seriously the greatest.

I grew up in suburban Canada with a massively wide (but thankfully short) driveway that became my duty to shovel when I turned 13. Fast forward 10 years and I move out, just in time for my old man to get free snow shovelling for life through the department of veterans affairs because of a lingering surgery concern.

When I saw the tied up woman I assumed it was Baylor.

D-Wade is still at the free throw line from that series

Wayne’s World 2 is fucking garbage.

I expected the law to have greater reach.

Obscure to white Americans, perhaps.

If it ever happens, I’ll ask them.

Another good trait in a person you’re grabbing a beer with is knowing when to shut the fuck up and just kind of sit there peacefully drinking your beer. Donald Trump absolutely has no idea how to do that.