I’ve gotta go office “Wheel O’ Death” vending machine riblets on this one.

Doesn’t pass the SNIFF TEST!

The services are optional for restaurants to participate, which is great because the fees charged make it more of a marketing effort than a profit endeavor. It’s essentially a wash.

Drinking just called. Said they’re doing just fine on the whole public fun perception. Doesn’t need the TV, thankyouverymuch.

One thing he isn’t eating?

One of my analog treasures is a wicker suitcase full of church recipe books inherited from my mother-in-law.

Wait until the I.R.S. reads this and tries to “garnish” her wages.

Mr. Leidenfrost, meet Mr. Maillard.

And now I’m wondering if I threw out the cake pop maker... Shit, I think I did.

Why this Dew is automatic
It’s systematic
It’s hyyyyyyydromatic
Why it’s Sweet Lightnin’!
(SWEET LIGHTNIN’!)

+1

Mildly related: Wikipedia keeps a very detailed page of Swedish profanity you can refer to the next time someone tries to foist vegan Swedish meatballs upon you.

One question: If you touch someone wearing Cheetos clothing, does it stain your fingers for the rest of the day?

AwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwWWWWWW!

Next time I bang my toe on the coffee table, my safe-word nonsense swear will now be, “SWEET PICKLE SALAD DRESSING!”

Fine. I’ll just call Officer Big Mac instead.

Ryan looks like he fell out of a They Might Be Giants cover band.

Mistress of the dark dip and dressing arts.

You’re, like, a condiment wiccan.

Airfryer, baby.