Ssomeone at the Las Vegas Albertsons needs a raise.

“or just ask for extra sauce”

“Overmuch”? You sound very cromulent.

Xladx with Qravy please. 

“Heinz says they’re only good for nine months.”

The problem is that a antivaxxer cartoon character going nuts over a free hot dog is not that hypothetical

I am pretty sure in the past fried chicken was never reheated.

Cold chicken or pizza at home is wrong (below a certain blood alcohol level), you are at home and have the means to warm it up.

When ever I buy just a few pieces of supermarket fried chicken (i.e. not the 8 piece) they always put it in a plastic bag. The first thing I do when they hand me that bag is tear it open...you do not let hot fried chicken steam in a plastic bag. 

It's not granted it's grated.

Is there a non disgusting way to give yourself a heart attack?

Respect on Domino’s for a cool promotion, shame on the people who thieved.

South of the border they are called taco puertas and you really don’t want to stick your hot dog into one of them.

But that's not really playing the game now is it?

Ccommunal jelly beans are good for the immune system is what I am hearing.

Let's put him on Ru Paul's Drag Race

I have a magic alley that is inhabited by all kinds of fairies. 

*serve immediately 

Don't ask questions that you really don't want to know the answers to.

You contradict yourself...situational awareness is great and should be practiced at all times, and then there is as you put it terrible luck which with all the situational awareness is still an unforeseen event.