Oh dear god...

I’ve been to three funerals in my life, but my great grandmother’s funeral when I was seventeen has to be the weirdest/most uncomfortable one of them all.

After being dead for 18 years, my father in law still has a stalker.

Unless they plan to show me a Weekend At Bernie’s-esque time, they better well fucking cremate me.

This is what happened at the oddest funeral I ever attended:

And I love the thought of Mariska trying to hump her, too!

Did Meloni attempt to hump her like a refrigerator?

Did she ever go on to explain any basis for her opinion, do you know? Were the SVU folks not appropriately dazzled by her or were they actually unprofessional, I wonder. Were they possibly a little smelly? Did Mariska try to beat her up? Did Meloni attempt to hump her like a refrigerator? I seem to be a little more…

The last time I told myself I was going to wear heels I put them on when I got out of my car, walked to the hotel conference room, said “oh no, this isn’t going to work!” walked back out to my car and put my flats on.

I wont have my son catching the gay from a pink cardboard box i tell you what

I wax my own pits with stripless hard wax.

Ugh I know. They are THE WORST AMIRITE?? Next thing you know those trashy whores will be showing up at women’s shelters with toys and books for the kids. TERRIBLE!

Melissa McCarthy, Kristen Wiig, Kate McKinnon and Leslie Jones spent Saturday dressed in their Ghostbusters costumes, visiting patients at the Floating Hospital for Children at Tufts Medical Center.

Clearly you haven’t read the bible. It’s three passages after that. Right before he tells those two dudes they can’t get married but before he goes on for three passages about bootstraps.

I’m in!! I will bring the flag (Can someone friendly from TX bring BBQ tnks)

They’re all working towards getting their MRS.

You mean get their MRS degree? :(

I’m blonde, and I definitely put way more than a shot glass full on. If I do a skimpy job, you can see that where I smeared it in two different places didn’t quite line up and I’ll get weird patchy burns.

I would never make a good clinic escort (there's no PP/women's clinic in my town) because I would not be able to restrain myself from smacking this woman in the picture, for several reasons, and then I would go to jail.