If West Virginia were any more inbred, it would be a sandwich.

They were asked to press “1” for English.

It really can’t be understated how terrible that call was.

“you’ve got to be fucking kidding me”

How could they not suck with a pitcher named Dyson

Whatever helps you sleep at night.

This is how one of our cats got herself a home. She walked into the open garage on a warm autumn day, opened the door from the garage to the kitchen, and waltzed in. Three years later, she’s basically running the place.

“Ma, you need to go to Costco again!”

For such an anti-Left stooge, he sure took a lot in government handouts. Must be a Republican.

I can’t tell if you’re just being dumb, a troll, a misogynist, or a dumb misogynist troll. You’re definitely being a class A shithead - “that’s my perspective, and I’m sticking to it!” is the response of someone who knows they’re wrong but they’re too much of an asshole to care.

I guess you haven’t watched her because she really does seem like she’d be fun at a party. Seems like the kind of girl who could drink you under the table too.

Whaaaat? I thought Aaron LOVED women.

The brake lights are only activated when the car is slowing down. Not necessarily when the pedal is fully released. It’s accelerometer based.

Everyone is free to run for president. I swear we would have stopped him if we could.

Public sector Wisconsin worker here. You’re not allowed to hate him more than I am.

That was also his response when Marshawn Lynch requested the ball at the goal line in the Super Bowl.

“Then would offer a trade ... I would then graciously decline.”

Last night, she retired after 649 consecutive games.