Her name is Alberta and she lives in Vancouver!

"2013's hottest album release party is for Bangerz! It's got twerking, doorknob pigtails, former Disney tweens on Molly, wrecking balls made from cronuts, monkeys trained to sign the lyrics of Achy Breaky Heart, and Mini-MileyZ."

Animating women and girls is so hard.

I truthfully got so annoyed skimming through the narcissistic novella he sent her that by the time I got to the fake death part, I had actually forgotten that was part of the story and thought he'd died as I was reading.

"If I haven't written something I'm going to beat myself up over for the next few days, I have…

You! YOU ARE MY FAVORITE. I was thinking "Franzen fanboy" the entire time.

I was seriously writing out "How much Jonathan Franzen do you think this guy has read?"

Welp, I've seen enough episodes of Criminal Minds to know how this will end.

Not only did you provide me with a single concrete target to project my fears and insecurities and Orientalist desires upon, you gave me someone to compete with, which is what I was implicitly doing every time I put my ideas to paper. I was trying to prove my eloquence and brilliance to someone whose own eloquence and…

Jada's hair is fierce and I love that she's so happy.

I would argue that even if Rebel Wilson is NOT happy and healthy as she is, we should leave her alone. It's not really my business to monitor Rebel Wilson's health.

Because I don't dance with trolls. Go along and play in traffic.

Trust me, they still do.

I know I have seen recent douchebag pics with popped collars. And with that, I bid you get off my retirement home lawn!

I'm imagining an entire room full of sweaty, beer-breath doods in popped polo shirts pulling this shit, and I'm just exhausted. Vibrators exist so that no woman should ever have to endure this.

First I read this:

I get a feeling he meant "No raping in front of witnesses" there.

Haha okay, but...your username.

Are you serious or are you seriously trolling? This doesn't only occur in Texas (where I live, by the way). This happens everywhere. Read the comments, dude.

Thank you for taking the time to write this post, Jenna. You are right in saying that I'm not bitter about the experience (I don't think it would be healthy for me to still be bitter after six years, after all), but that doesn't mean I think Terry's behavior is okay. I'm pretty shocked no one's spoken about this…