A great man once said: “Person man woman camera TV.” words to live by.

So you’re saying I’m not a cardio-thoracic surgeon? I’ve got an MS Paint certificate and a trail of corpses that say different.

Bordering on “probably totally shit and likely blinded some people.”

I wonder how good an opthalmologist he is, given he had to create his own certification body to credential himself, because nobody else would?

Paul doesn’t give a shit about what’s true. He just wants to tell the MAGA rubes that “deep state killed yer grannie.”

Since his use of a walker during his trial was purely a stunt aimed at gaining sympathy, we can safely assume all his subsequent “health problems” are similarly manufactured.

It’s a huge gamble, because he’s setting the country up as a huge petri dish for viral mutation. Once an enterprising bit of viral DNA figures out how to bamboozle the current vaccines, it’s back to square one.

You should just follow the inspirational lead of the Mother Country and say “fuck it” to COVID and open everything up. BoJo definitely knows what he’s doing!

“Parents want their kids to learn to think critically, by unquestioningly accepting whatever fairy story best fits the prevailing white supremacist, state capitalist, exceptionalist narrative.”

Don’t worry, though, because the LA Sheriff has decided not to make his brownshirts enforce the mask mandate. Seems he a microbiologist, because he’s decided that “the science doesn’t support it.” It’s great that we have such highly-qualified health professionals in law enforcement.

In unrelated news, here’s helpful aritcle on how to remove embedded ticks:

“You can’t keep my client in jail as a risk to society, because he isn’t a risk to society, because he’s in jail.”

Aunt Ida's corpse is probably still strapped to the roof rack.

What are Chick-Fil-a’s “principles,” exactly. I mean besides promoting heart disease, stroke and the industrial-scale torture and murder of domestic fowl?

To be fair, they are an abomination.

Clive James once referred to a book he reviewed as “A cubic paperback, written by the type of American author who feels the need to take revenge on his country for making him illiterate.”

Trumpucky Fried Chicken?

Can you imagine if Trump expirss before his stranglehold on the GOP wanes? Every red state politician with their eye on national office will be rushing to name whatever they can after The Great Pumpkin, in a desperate attempt to curry favor with MAGA voters.

OK, I’m old as shit, but, back in the late ‘70s, my High School American History class taught precisely nothing about...well anything relevant to the present day.

Maybe he can parlay the act into an animated series full of jailhouse hijinks, with the underlying message that rapists and abusers need love too. Call it “Rohipnol Albert and the Cosby Felons.”