Sorely Vexed
sorvex
3/29/20
1:19 PM
3

One of those “sophisticated” IPAs that’s basically a bag of hops, a pitcher of water, and the instructions to “dilute to taste.”

3/29/20
1:57 AM
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You are absolutely correct about Cap’n Crunch, of course, but not that stuff they sell today with the rainbow colored Crunchberries. That is sacrilege and abomination.
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3/27/20
1:07 PM
2

As a fellow cripple, I’m resigned to being among the first on the pyre. May our burning bodies light the way to a glorious future!

3/26/20
2:07 PM
34

Ours is a just-in-time economy, with everything shaved to the bone, costs cut, supply lines attenuated, employees kept to the minimum. Read more

3/26/20
1:29 PM
8

These bastards would happily let everyone die. If you aren’t making money for them, why are you even alive? Read more

3/26/20
1:05 PM
36

They should hire him to narrarate National Park training films. “I Ain’t Messin’ Witchu: A Field Guide to the Fauna of the American West.” Read more

3/25/20
2:19 PM
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You don’t have to stretch too far to make the comparison. If the virus, left unchecked, infects 50% of the US population - as some experts are predicting - and has a mortality rate of 3-4%, that adds up to 5.1-6.8m dead in the US - squarely in Holocaust territory. Read more

3/25/20
2:10 PM
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But that’ll be the Democrats fault for “holding things up.”

3/25/20
2:09 PM
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Trump has many of the qualities of a god to his followers. His every senseless utterance is mined for timeless wisdom; his haphazard actions are viewed as the mysterious workings of a divine entity playing “four dimensional chess”; his conspiracy theories, overt racism, and “deep state” rantings are a call to the Read more

3/24/20
1:16 PM
33

It was great when people like Danny Thomas and Jerry Lewis advocated for causes they really believed in. You could see their commitment and dedication, and they stuck with it for decades. Read more

3/24/20
1:09 PM
12

When I was a kid, I remember seeing a celebrity testifying in front of Congress about some public health issue. Their credibility seemed to rest largely on the fact they played a doctor on TV. Read more

3/21/20
2:35 PM
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So we’re basically saying Trump is more tech literate than Biden? Awesome.

3/21/20
2:24 PM
59

In this timeline? Hah! She'll be Trump's next SCOTUS pick and Kanye will be Pope.

3/19/20
1:26 PM
11

Well, they’re apparently calling it “Kung Flu” in the White House, so expect him to start calling it that as soon as someone lets him in on the “joke.”

3/13/20
2:46 PM
12

Easy: they didn’t believe enough. Religion always has that excuse when its spells and incantations don’t work. Read more

3/13/20
2:22 PM
24

Prediction: he’ll blame Pence, Obama, China and the media for the outbreak, impose a flight ban on Antarctica, tell us we’re all gonna die, but don’t worry cause he’s totally fine. Read more