All that racist alcohol and medication really should come with warning labels, or be stocked in locked cabinets. It's just a matter of time before someone mixes them and turns into Jefferson Davis.

So this is what's meant by going high when they go low. Bravo!

The word “but” has come to have one purpose in contemporary usage: to completely negate or reverse the meaning of whatever was said/written before it.

Nah, they’d just eat arond it and leave it in the bowl.

It seems more like a livestock-feed operation: “We’re runnin’ low on slurry in the heartwarming drama trough. Fill ‘er up!” I guess the “comedies you can fall asleep to without missing anything” hopper was starting to overflow.

Who knows? There was a lot of that wheelchair n’ walker, pitiful old man playacting during his trial, trying to milk the jury for sympathy. Pretty sure that all got left at the courthouse door when no longer needed.

How on earth is Hallmark going to spin this into a heartwarming redemption movie?

Ah, the Costanza Gambit: “Was that wrong? Is that sort of thing frowned upon?”

Antifreeze is a known carcinogen, so the cop feared for his life!

I, for one, welcome our Reptilian Physician overlord.

Maybe they can figure out a way to aerosolize the vaccine and pump it out through HVAC systems in every public building. Or disperse it from aircraft, which would have the added benefit of making the “chemtrail” lunatics’ heads explode.

Sank when parked.

There’s suspension of disbelief, and then there's beating disbelief to death with a crowbar.

The family may come through unscathed, but it sounds like the laws of physics are brutally tortured and murdered again.

This can only go spectacularly well for everyone involved.

How can the penalty for nearly killing someone be the same as the one for merely having an unsafe load? Doesn’t Ohio have laws regarding reckless endangerment or even negligent property damage? This dipshit nearly killed two people, yet his “punishment” is a new set of straps and a ticket?

Abortion is against God’s Law. God wants every child to be born, with the unwanted ones dumped at “Mother & Baby” homes where they can be quietly starved and buried in mass graves. The rest are to be used as playthings for priests. This is the Word of the Lord. Amen.

Never mind that Midsomer has a murder rate that would put the average warzone to shame. I'm amazed it isn't a ghost town.

In totally unrelated news, the Metropolitan Police are, and always have been, utterly corrupt.

It’s simple grade-school conjugation: