Taser. There are no bad dogs, just shitty owners.

Sure. I know the intelligence services have been hobbled by Trump, but even in their current fallen state they wouldn’t clear this woman to run the snack concession in the lobby.

I dunno. I’ve lived in some pretty all-white neighborhoods from time to time, so I feel qualified to say that “normal behavior” in such places appears to be a smorgasbord of bizarrely-specific neuorses, exacerbated by free-floating anxiety and the constant fear that someone, somewhere is “getting away with something.”

You’re right, of course. I neglected to account for the way some terms get - ahem - gentrified the longer they’re in circulation.

Strong list. I’d only take exception to “52. Essential Workers.” Too often, that translates to, “expendable minority who has to perform risky work so white people can stay safe at home.”

How did this schmuck help bring down some of the biggest mafia kingpins in New York? I'm beginning to think mob bosses aren't too smart.

Giuliani may be a shitty lawyer, but he’d have to be a complete cretin to trust Trump to “work (his compensation) out at the end.”

An added benefit of waiting until after the inauguration is that we won’t be forced to say “All hail Trump!” if we want to be vaccinated.

So many of the TV “true crime” and “cold case” shows leave me shaking my head at how slapdash the original investigations were.

Well, they say that con artists make the easiest marks, so...

Was going to say this. They knew exactly what they were doing.

He’ll definitely turn out to have been taking that medication that makes you racist. Weirdly, that particular side effect only seems to affect white people.

Sensible. If you’re staring down the barrel of a two-shot gun and you know one of the chambers is loaded, you’d be stupid to think you aren’t going to get shot... and that the empty chamber is your friend.

Well, they ran a whole country into the ground, I suppose.

Lame Duck a l’Orange really is foundering, isn’t he? Grasping at any piece of flotsam that comes within reach, as he goes under for the third time.

Because Scotland is part of the UK and the UK has an extradition treaty with the US.

He’s no use to Putin after this and Vladi doesn’t strike me as someone who keeps his used kleenexes around after they’ve served their purpose.

So the presidential election was stolen but the downballot Republican gains were legit? How's that work, exactly?

I don’t think he’d be allowed to leave the country. Too much of a risk to the President’s life, so the SS wouldn’t allow it.

There it is! It ain’t Lennie if he doesn’t have a zinger.