I honestly thought you wrote "go down on" which, well, was also kind of awesome! Most delicious blowjob ever!

I agree! I make homemade waffle tacos (sort of) with fried chicken tenders every once in a while and they're really good. Of course, my kitchen isn't being run by Taco Bell, Home of the 3 AM Diarrhea Sprints.

God, seriously. What is wrong with just having friends wear a nice/favorite formal outfit of their choosing?! We're so matchy-matchy, going to a wedding is like going to a prom in the 80's, albeit with less enormous hair.

Mr. MacNasty once found part of a hot pink balloon in his Big Mac. Which, I told him, is what he gets for ordering a Big Mac.

Really nicely said. Seriously.

o_O Dude. I want you to think about what you just said. lol

THEY MIGHT BE SORRY! YOU WILL NEVER KNOW BECAUSE YOU ARE TOO PROUD TO ASK. THERE IS A POPSICLE-SHAPED HOLE IN YOUR HEART.

NOT EVEN POPSICLES?!

It's too easy. You're better than that, Pinkham. :)

I kept reading his name as "Anthony Perkins," which I don't think is totally wrong...

I will totally make it worth your while! I'm a good cook and a better hostess. Plus, we can get fucked up together and eat BBQ!! :)

Look, I don't want to defend these fuckers, but those things are goddamn TASTY.

Move to NC and I will show you the glories of getting high and consuming BBQ and hush puppies in much the same manner.

Getting high and consuming Taco Bell Nachos is a Grand MacNasty Past-time, damnit. IT IS MY HERITAGE.

This is why poor Rebecca needed Vodka, Uber. No one should face Hardee's sober, much less first thing in the morning.

I am fairly sure most of my paranoia stems from similar childhood traumas.

That sounds terrifying.

How did you do this post without ONCE mentioning the Smuggy McSmuggerson little bitch face on Deb herself? It makes me want to punt boxes of Swiss Rolls through the aisles of my store.

Nearly every day, some way or how, i.e. phone call, email or texting. But my mom (and dad) = awesome. Not a chore at all. :)

WHY. WHY HAVE YOU PLACED "GOB JOB" IN MY HEAD?!