How does the study explain historical gender beliefs that posit that ladies were the sex-crazed horndog gender and men were the ones who were all "we're too intellectual to be led around by our gonads"?

Heh, that's somebody else's nightmare.

So, are there no recent moms in Michigan who have problems producing enough milk for their child who could use some of this?

Fisticles. Sliffituffs.

Tomo came up with this years ago.

Your camp knew that 'Black Rider' guy from the 'A Fistful of Paintballs' episode of Community?

I graduated from Uni, but my parents still don't know I didn't complete my certificate for the 4 years of art college I took after that. It's been two years, and I've almost forgotten this was a thing I did not finish. The place had such loosey-goosey admin that I wouldn't have been surprised if they'd forgotten to…

And ranch dressing.

I love Kung Fu Hustle SO HARD. I think it might be because of the music. It's a serious gang war beatdown, but the music makes it so much f'n FUN.

Even the octopi can't even with this.

Yeah, but my model keeps leaning over the desk next to her and moving her arms. It's kind of distracting.

I don't enjoy stories about messing with assholes' food as much mainly because I want the assholes to be aware that they've been burned and in such a way that they can't prove that the person who burned them did it. If they walk out of the story and don't know that what they did had consequences, then I'm not…

That phrase deserves to be an official Kitchenette tag.

Who the hell calls up their dinner guests to gush about how great their own food was?! Especially since you were there and was the one actually making it, not to mention how atrocious the experience was??

self-proclaimed (is there any other kind?)

What about eyeball jewelry?

Champagne Chocolate would be an awesome character. I also suggest Gunpowder Gelatine.

I've been drinking these things for years! You know you can stick a straw in it and drink it like you see in the cartoons, right? Also, DO NOT THROW THE EMPTY COCONUT AWAY. Every young coconut also comes with a free serving of delicious coconut jelly pudding inside if one could be bothered to break it open and spoon…

I always refuse to watch things until the hype train is long gone and the real criticisms can come out again.

Tell us more about some of your previous years' presents!