The ideas Cosby has to put on television have already provided a dozen or so season of Law & Order: Special Victims Unit.

The terrible thing is that Cosby almost definitely thinks he's vindicated and exculpated himself by giving this interview.

Rule #2: Make soap bricks that do double duty as IEDs.

Uh oh. Katie Rife broke the first rule about writing about Chuck Palahniuk.

The hell? I literally summarized our exchange and took special pains to show how you have spiraled off your intended course from the word go. Perhaps you simply do not understand rhetoric?

All of which you failed to do. I said conservatives can't be funny because they target the powerless. You wrote that conservatives keep to themselves. A conservative making jokes cannot keep to himself; he must target someone. Either you do not understand your comments or mine, or you still don't know the meaning of…

But you did not succeed in criticizing — you actually meant countervailing, discrediting or gainsaying, but whatever — me. All you did was amplify my original comment.

My point exactly. Humor equals critique. Since conservatives' alleged humor-cum-critique targets the weakest elements of society, it counts as cruelty rather than amusement.

Humor requires a target.

Worse than having no sense of self-deprecation, monied elites also have no concept of the "you gotta laugh" reflex that people who must struggle need to simply make it from sunup to sundown. Irony and absurdity make terrible situations bearable. If you never suffer, you don't need a sense of humor that connects with…

Conservatives can't be funny by definition because they target the powerless rather than try to delegitimize the powerful.

Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell anymore.

With 600-plus complete voice tracks* on tape, couldn't the producers just splice new dialog together from existing takes?

Close, but The Blob is actually just a metaphor for The Stuff.

"I want this motherfucking muculence off my motherfucking city street!"
— sample The Blob dialog

Liar. "Great 8-bit style bands" do not/cannot exist.

I imagine this is what Franco Pop recorded by Hello Kitty would sound like.

Say what you will about benighted and militant misogyny; at least it is the opposite of an ethos.

You have to figure it hurts to be as dickish as the writer of the piece O'Neal is lampooning. Actually believing the thoughts expressed must cause terrible migraines due to the echoing cognitive dissonance.

That's how you get Ants, Man.