My god.

And thanks to gas prices soaring past $1, then $1.25, then $1.7, etc in quick succession right as I was getting my learner’s permit (to cracking $2.10 by the time I graduated high school and needed to drive to college classes every day, I don’t know that I’ve actually ever paid for gas with cash. When/How/Why would I…

Yeah, I can’t evenremember anymore when every gas station I came across— even in podunk towns— *didn’t* have signs up all over the pumps imploring you to pay *before* pumping (I’m 36). I’m assuming that nowadays, pump technology can prevent any gas from coming out if you haven’t paid first, even you’re going inside to…

Yesss, this! All my local Wawas have started putting little signs on the pump asking people to please pull the fuck out once they’re done pumping their goddamn gas (paraphrasing) but it still happens. And these are big-ass suburban Wawas with a crack-ton of pumps *and* a crack-ton of parking spaces. Don’t tie up the…

Same, every time they re-use that picture, I lose my appetite. 

“and enough “fuck you”money to retire and do whatever the hell he wants. That’s the American Dream right there”

You know, I do still feel bad for that kicker and as a Philly resident, I don’t really have a leg to stand on (heh) but...oh god, when the Bears’ mascot just falls right over after the doink. It’s just... [chef’s kiss]. I’ll never not get a sick sense of glee out of watching it, even if I know karma will get me back…

It’s eerie how well this describes my relationship with running. And figure skating. And writing-outside-of-my-day-job. Christ on a cracker. And my love of all things sci-fi but ESPECIALLY Star Wars.

To steal from my own twitter, I would vote for anyone smart enough to retire from the NFL before their body/brain was completely destroyed. And I say this as someone who just signed up for a friend’s football pool for like, the 8th straight year

Thank you and yes, Wes is a very good boy <3

He also sort of looks like a cross between a bearded Mandy Patinkin and one of my old bosses (nice guy though so I don’t really want to associate him with this choad)

Man, this sucks. Megan is cool and I’m sad she’s leaving and even sadder that corporate buttheads don’t know how to run media enterprises.

I think OP should take a page out of Bob and Linda Belcher’s handbook--get fed up with people staring at their screens, inadvertently help an undercover police officer catch an identity thief who’s skimming everyone else’s info, and then unplug the router because it’s all too distracting from making burgers. 

HARD SAME, it’s awful

Honestly those look really cool!

He also tried to kill Brian and Dom by blowing up Brian’s house, nearly taking out Mia, Jack, and Pending Baby 2 along the way! Did everyone forget this????

KV is the best part of Criminal Minds, even after all these years. Thank you for such a great article!

The sad part is, he’ll absolutely be on top again whether it’s because of a rushed-to-print tell-all, reality show gig, or even just his family letting him draw a paycheck from their (actual) business again. The Fyre guy was trying to start a new scam as #FyreFestival was actively dying. These jack asses never see any…

God, I would love to hear from his wife because seriously, WTF

Seriously, yes! This chuckle-f*** is no different than the scary Theranos lady, Billy “Not Actually Seth But Isn’t the Resemblance Uncanny” McFarland, etc. At least they got a few good months (or years) in before their scams fell apart.