He thought he'd have a chance when he heard how much she loves the "Blackhawks".

Laugh all you want, but by my count he's 16-1 all-time against himself in Rock-Paper-Scissors.

Mario Balotelli Does Thing

Wes Craven would already own the rights to the biopic?

What if Tim Tebow was black?

Linin' up

Hastily thrown together alternative version, below.

Is there any info about whether this position is open to belly-scratchers?

Mission: Impossible To Watch

Was the banana crack even racist at all?

Historians would later cast doubt on Darwin's conclusions, questioning whether a few hard tugs to see if it was a costume constituted enough rigorous research to support the theories put forth in The Oranging of the Species.

Barack Obama is Donovan McNabb

Perhaps he just feels a special connection with Johnson, as men who don't understand how to do curls.

Pictured: Norv throws a flag on God, fifteen yards for face-Masking.

Offense, defense & special teams is only half the game. You gotta factor in officiating - Team Whitey wins big time here, Blackie's D couldn't even breathe on Whitey's QBs or receivers without losing half the field but Whitey could probably literally bring the lumber to theirs. Also kicking - WHITEY HAS ALL THE…

Their respective teams are both being held hostage by their insane fan bases?

I know no one's gonna believe me, but Brian Windhorst's voice sounds exactly like I always imagined it would.

In retrospect, the final episode of this season's 19 Kids and Counting probably should have been retitled.

You sonofawhore.

( Jokescooped \/ )