“And then everybody was staring like they’ve never seen three kids holding a crying man down shoving money in his pants.”

“We’ll name him Bob #1, and Dad, you can just go by Bob #2 or maybe no name at all.”

A Seth Meyers-hosted episode with no Stefon cameo? What the fuck has this world come to?

So relieved this show turned out to be the piece of shit I assumed it would be. Jennifer Garner’s inclusion was basically the seal of death.

It was a Christmas joke.

Oh, shit, was I commenting on Ambien again?

Well, that was... something.

“Shut the fuck up! Shut the FUCK up!”

That’s one small Oscar for Chazelle, one giant Best Picture win to another movie.

“Aw, Hank. I always wished I had hair like yours. Fuck you, Hank.”

This isn’t news or anything, but seriously, Julie Kavner’s voice is so goddamn wrecked now. Marge already sounds like she’s on her deathbed in every episode, this one especially. If that’s the price of keeping a show years past its prime on the air, FOX sure is milking it for all it’s fucking worth.

Not sure if anyone else caught the Manchester by the Sea and The Legend of Zelda Fitzgerald arcade games at Funtime, but damn, do I wish they were real.

A small but decent improvement over last week. Awkwafina’s monologue was surprisingly endearing, and she had a nice go-with-the-flow energy the whole time, even if most of the sketches were, as Kate put it, “meh, queen.” They hit the nail on the head with that Ted Cruz commercial, though.

“Get any evidence the priest might have left behind!”

“I am a 2018 Range Rover woman! I AM A GOLDEN GODDESS!”

I guess you could say this movie’s like a turd... in the wind.

As soon as I saw Hank checking his phone for Sirena, I knew the worst was already set in motion to happen. And boy, that reveal did not make it any easier to sit through, although Sirena’s “holy shit” reaction to Scare Bear did lessen the tension a little.

This show has become weirdly obsessed with death/near-death lately. If that’s not a desperate cry for cancellation, I don’t know what fucking is.

“You’re a thirsty bitch!”

Welp, that was a dud. Solid Matt Damon/Kavanaugh cold open aside, it seemed like the focus kept going from Pete Davidson and his annoying Ariana Grande engagement bullshit to Kanye and his confusing mélange of underwhelming new music and tired MAGA-support “controversy.” Half the time, I forgot Adam Driver was even…