Everything about What Even Matters Anymore? was fucking fantastic, right down to Jessica popping open a bottle of wine with her mouth and chugging it down in depression. If only it weren’t all so painfully true.

This show just give no fucks anymore, and I’m strangely fine with that.

No stray observation about the tourist couple preserving Versace’s blood on a ripped-out magazine ad shortly after denying them an autograph? I don’t know why, but that shit got the biggest reaction out of me.

This sounds like the Ryan Murphy-iest season of anything Ryan Murphy’s ever fucking done, and I’m still oddly excited for it.

So just how long is Karl gonna be a thing? ‘Cause if they plan on keeping him longer than Louis, that’s just adding to insult to fucking injury.

I might be the only one who thinks this, but holy fuck, are the kids in this show the worst. Is it in their scripts for them to act like cold, emotionless pricks, or does it just come naturally to them?

“You have reached the Wiggum residence. If Ralph is stuck in something, press 1. If something is stuck in Ralph, press 2. If this is Ralph, Daddy is not in the phone. Do not open the phone looking for me.”

After this gem of an episode, we definitely deserve a Louise/Nat episode. Of all the role models she could’ve chosen, I’m glad it’s a batshit insane limo driver.

Never thought I’d ever hear Bill Murray make a jab at someone as insignificantly repulsive as Logan Paul, but man, was it satisfying.

I’d give it a B+ just for how brief Martin Short’s screen time was before getting killed off. Also, the lineup of suspects repeating that “Whistler’s Mother” line gave me a pretty good laugh.

As soon as they started with that “Another Day of Sun” parody, I knew it was all leading to a lazy “Moonlight won” end tag. I’m surprised how much lazier it ended up being.

Holy shit, that Pink Diamond reveal was so unexpected yet so worth the wait! That (plus Stevonnie growing facial hair because of fucking course) put “Jungle Moon” above “Lars of the Stars” for me, no question.

Can we all just agree that Connie needs to keep her new haircut for the rest of the fucking series?

Whoever animated the depressed face Peridot makes when she’s dragged out of the tub deserves a goddamn raise.

I just hope CN will at least give the show one last shred of dignity and let it go out with a big-ass marathon the day it airs its finale. It probably won’t happen, but it sure as fuck deserves that.

Eh, it was fine. Wasn’t really a fan of the musical numbers, but the casting was mosty spot-on (especially the kid they got to play Randy), and the sets were at least nice to look at.

Perkins.

Yeah, this one sucked. You could tell Kevin was trying extra hard to make the material work, but it all just fell apart, especially that cringeworthy teddy bear sketch. How the fuck did that one make it past the writers’ room? Not a great way for the show to close out the year, but hey, that awesome Foo Fighters cover…

I got a pretty good laugh out of Greg casually mentioning how he’s still a millionaire. The man sure does know how to save.

I got a pretty good laugh out of Greg casually mentioning how he’s still a millionaire. The man sure does know how to save.