Sure, Milwaukee’s the problem. You know... Milwaukee... where Scott Walker used to be County Executive...

Yes. Such a REFRESHING feeling!

How do you KNOW you were born? Were you even there? Oh wait...

On the other hand, I still adore the five year old girl who corrected her dad after he said, “See, honey, look at the lion!” “Daaad. That’s a TIGER.” She was, of course, correct.

Well, if you BELIEVE in years!

Maybe it’s an Autocorrect Fail, but I LOVE “endangerment rings”.

“Dad, can I go to Jimmy’s house?”

Yeah! There Will Be Blood. So what?

STARBUCKS POST! STARBUCKS POST! STARBUCKS POST!

you’ve got a point there

Oh, and ANOTHER thing: “cute shoes.” If the shoes are “cute”, I can’t wear them. They will hurt me. You go wear all the cute shoes you want.

Staying up until 1 am to make sure a software deployment went okay. Go hire somebody young for that.

Even MORE insane: KRTK tv station says they charged her for possession of “.02 ounces of marijuana.” I mean... WHAT?

PARADOX.

WAFFLE. WINDOW.

Now I’m making waffles for dinner tonight.

“in this vein”? Really? Really?

Rotary cutters are hella sharp!

Yeah, my mind went “...evolutionary biology BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH...”. I would like to think that the vast majority of men, by virtue of their brains, are no longer subject to urges to spread their sperm out there. Therefore the men who use this “assume that since she is breathing she would like to have sex” technique…

I won’t make friends with this remark, but how do you know? How do you know that nobody even noticed she was there?