Stop oppressing me.

The most childish thing you've done is get married at 22. The most adult thing you'll ever do is get divorced.

Ive heard women feel like frauds.

Is that you, Shaun? Are you looking for the mayo?

All this coming from a fraud. Why do black people allow this white guy to speak for them again??

There are poor white, single mothers making minimum wage in the suburbs.

Maxim magazine?? What the fuck is this? 1999??

Someone's jelly

Yeah, but how many black kids will it have, Clover?

I'm schmoozing. I desperately need an internship so I can get a foot in the door. Can I wash your car?

You beat the odds. I’ll raise a glass to you, sir/madam.

We can talk about how easily swayed idiots are by media coverage.

Yes, lucky for the victims, who were only stabbed in the face, they'll survive. A long, long time.

Is that a Kardashian reference?

Naked booze party. Take off your knickers.

I usually stop drinking around noon.

No, but we will ask you to make our steaks rare and bring us another bottle of Nebbiolo.

Alarmed? Did you report it to someone?

Yes, but how many trans women does he have in his cabinet??

Black people are never wrong. Don't you read Gawker articles??